Semi Charmed Life

I am in KL, in Coffee Bean at the moment.

Ahhh... This is the life...

...Or so would be the line in my thoughts usually. But not today. Today, or this time, is different. I do not enjoy this late night rendezvous as much as I would have, ordinarily. After all what's the second thing you miss about KL, after the food? Late night hangouts, right? Like, I would never get to do this in Sydney. Well, by 'this' I mean sitting in a place that's not a bar, with a friend, on a weeknight.


So why am I not content here anymore? I don't know, really. Perhaps it's because Sydney has came to be my home more than I would like to admit. Don't get me wrong, I love Sydney. Like, LOVE. But I didn't come from there. I didn't grow up there. So why the hell am I more comfortable there? It's not supposed to happen.

You know what made me realise this? When I started enjoying salty popcorn more than sweet ones at the cinema. I mean, really. And I hated salty popcorn!! What's wrong with me. I reckon it's the ultimate sign that Sydney is taking over. Oh no!


And as per, I don't have friends in Malaysia. It's something that's proven again and again. Gosh, what's with these people and their problem with keeping in touch? And I thought I was bad. Oh well, I don't care too much. It's quite abit refreshing going to the gym and not knowing three quarters of the people, and the staff too. At least I know I won't run into an ex-boyfriend. Or an ex-crush. Or worse, an ex-hook up (Not that it happens alot 0:) )

Alright, maybe I should update on my life, and not just display stupid random thoughts.

I just got a new phone!! Yes, finally. It's a super cool Windows Phone 7. Yeah, before you say anything bad about it, I'll say I love it and do not believe every bad review you read. It's no Android, I know. But it trumps the iPhone and Blackberry anyday. Hah.

I'm reading The Last Symbol by Dan Brown. Yeah, I just started. I know it came out ages ago. But I was too busy reading classics. They're wayyy awesome.

Ummm... I am kind of, sort of seeing someone. *Blushes* See, it's just starting. And it's not serious. And I haven't really told anyone yet, because it may not work out. But yeah, I am being monogamous (Or trying really hard to be), because I want to actually try to make it work. Which means I don't want to be the one who screws it up. Who is he? That's a secret I'll never tell. Or at least not until I'm ready to. As usual, my fear of commitment is eating me up. Ergh.

I've put on weight. Blame it on the food. As we all know, Malaysian food is soooooo good! And I can't stop eating! Even an everyday workout at the gym doesn't help. :-S But I do appreciate it if you don't comment about my weight the next time you see me. Thank you! Oh don't worry, I'll lose it all in a week when I go back to Sydney.

My results. Oh yes, I haven't been telling anyone about it, because I expected better. But oh well, there's always next semester right? I got Credit for all subjects. Nothing to show off for. Like I said, I expected better.

Oh, and I just got back from PD. Spontaneously decided to go literally an hour before, on Saturday, right after the gym. Packed my bags, and off I went for the weekend. Had fun! Just got back yesterday. Will do it again!!

AND I'm going to Singapore soon. Yay me!

Finally, I have officially moved out of the Village. Staying off campus next semester. Sandrine found a place for us, and I can't wait to start living there. So come visit us some time. :-)


So yeah, that's pretty much it. Not much else. Like I said, I'm in KL now. Call/FB/SMS/MSN/Skype me if you wanna hangout before I go back to Sydney.

Still living life like it means everything and nothing at the same time. :-)



I believe in the sand beneath my toes,
The beach gives a feeling,
An earthy feeling,
I believe in the faith that grows,
And the four right chords can make me cry,
When I'm with you I feel like I could die.
And that would be all right,
All right

LoVe~
MzP<3

Mine

I've gotta credit this one song for making me want to be in a relationship again. You know, to fall in love and be happy together and get married and have kids.

And of course, that song is Taylor Swift's Mine. Not just the song, really. More like the video clip.




So yes, finally Zue wants a relationship again. Approaching slowly though. I know it's not easy to get rid of the fear of commitment. It'll take some time yet. AND there's the deal with finding the right guy. Sigh... So much work!

I'm not saying I'll get a boyfriend tomorrow. I'm just saying I'm ready to do the work... to make it work. So here I am saying I'm going to stop running away from something more. But what am I scared of anyways? I dunno. A million things, and nothing at the same time.


I was a flight risk... with a fear of flying
Wondering why we bother with love when it never lasts
 

Wish me luck! xoxo


LoVe~
MzP<3

It's Raining Men

Years ago, maybe 5, maybe 10, I was a little teenage girl who's really into reading those little teenage books with teenage drama. There were so many of them, and I've read so many, I can't even begin to count.

And of course, as a teenage girl, I understood. I took examples from the stories when they make sense, and I apply them to my life, when they are applicable.

So one of those books, there was this pretty teenage girl in high school. She's popular and pretty... and pretty much similar to most characters in those books. At one point, in the hundreds of books she's featured in, she had 3 guys in her life. Guy number one is a handsome blond haired quarterback who just broke up with his long term girlfriend. Guy number two is a kind hearted green eyed quarterback from another school. And guy number three is a strong-jawed, good-looking, eccentric champion swimmer who's also very smart. And of course these 3 guys are really hot, being athletic and all.

So pretty much, the story goes that she couldn't choose between them. And when it fails with one, the next guy steps in. And then, hanging with one guy, the next guy would ask her out. After which, she got upset, and she would mope around not being able to decide.

So one day, while seeing the swimmer, the nice guy asked her to accompany her to a sports award thing, so she went. There, to her surprise, all 3 guys were present, and the other two came with hot dates as well. She was a little devastated. When the smart swimmer guy, saw her looking distressed, talked to her and asked, "Who do you really want?"

She looked around the room at all the three guys, and said, "I don't know."

So this guy looked at her, gave a little amused smile, and said, "Have you ever thought of being single?"



That story, I can't get out of my head lately. That story is why I am single right now. Because frankly, I couldn't choose. I still can't. And I'm happy staying single, rather than hurt someone I don't want to, unintentionally.

What does San call them? Suitors? lol. I'd hardly think they are one of those suitors trying to win a princess's hand in marriage or anything like that. But yeah San thinks everything is a fairytale, that's why I love her. :-)


So yes, the only problem I'm having right now is, I'm still hurting some people by simply staying single. I don't understand anymore. So right now, I'm supposed to choose, or not? But what if I can't? What if I just simply don't want to?



As you guessed, the only song that fits this blog entry:

'Cos tonight for the first time
At just about half past ten
For the first time in history
It's gonna start raining men

It's raining men
Hallelujah it's raining men, Amen
I'm gonna go out
I'm gonna let myself get
Absolutely soaking wet

It's raining men
Hallelujah it's raining men
Every specimen
Tall blond dark and mean
Rough and tough and strong and lean

LoVe~
MzP<3

Wow

So I met someone.


And all I can say is... Wow.



 LoVe~
MzP<3

I Love The Way You Lie

Hmm...

England just got defeated by Germany 4-1.

Australia just got a new PM. A female PM.

I just got back from Penang.

I would think these are at the top of my list of current happenings at the moment. LOL.

I miss Sydney. The weather, my friends. My life. My people. My place.

I've been single for 7 months now. Wow. Longest time ever! I'm still loving it. Every minute. But why though? I do realise that most people are scared of change. In relationships, even more so. So most single people I know, would remain single. And the people in relationships would continue seeking relationships when one fails. Unless there is a traumatising experience in there somewhere. Then they change.

I wonder why sometimes. I wonder why I'm sooo far removed from relationships these days. I avoid it quite abit. Maybe my last few relationships had a bigger negative impact on my life than I care to admit. Yes, yes, I'm never seen as the victim. But why is it this time, I'm the one who is so scarred that I can't imagine myself in another full on long term relationship?

I do think, if I find the right guy, I would want a relationship with him. But wait, I did crush on someone, and would want a relationship with him, but in every scenario in my head, it has always been of me telling him right from the start that I don't want anything too serious. I just can't do it anymore.

When I think of relationships these days, it's of fights, and insecurity and screaming and pain and depression. While I used to not live without it, I can't imagine myself being in it anymore. I have a tendency of being in abusive relationships too. And come to think of it, eventhough I can remember my early childhood experiences, sometimes in technicolor detail, I do forget most of my years in a relationship. You know, the way your body forget certain pain just because it is too much? Maybe I just sub-consciously push it so far back in my head. Either way, who knows?

No, I do not wnat to be in a relationship now, or in the near future. But if I am, I assure you, it's because I really like that guy. Or maybe even because he's the one. No more dating just anyone. I will be sooo picky on the next person, until I find my Pegasus. And until then, I would enjoy my single life to the limit.

Or maybe I'm overthinking it. Maybe it's just because I'm hanging out with Westerners alot more and I'm just absorbed into their culture.

One thing about abusive relationships though. I have seen it, and been in it. It's not pretty. I know what it feels quite well. I do thank God it never got too bad. Bad enough, though. It is painful. not so much physically, but more mentally. I have never been strong enough to leave. Instead I would start a path of self-destruction. I would probably start cheating or something like that. It's my only defense mechanism. Knowing it will hurt him someday when he finds out. Fuck, it's wrong. The most wrong thing to do in a relationship: hurting each other until finally one lets go because they've had enough. I know very well, I should just leave. But seriously, when you love someone so much that you spend most of your time with him, and planned your future with him, and stopped doing anything fun with your friends because he's not there, letting go is hard. What's a few bruises right, comparing to everything both of you has invested? And he's promised to never ever do it again. He cried. He begged. He told you he loves you and will never let you go.

And I'm speaking for all those who are or were in abusive relationships. When he begs and promises yet again, we find that tiny tiny spark of hope that it would be true this time. After all, you've never met a guy who loves you as much as he does. And then there's all that passion. If your fight is that bad, passion is high most probably everywhere else too. And how do we let go of that passion? Beats me. I still have yet to figure it out.

Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that’s alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that’s alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie

LoVe~

MzP<3

Until I Find You

I just want my camera back!! 

It's a silver Lumix in a red casing.

I lost it in the Ubar on a Thursday night.

And while I'm writing about cameras,

I would also want my pink Sony Cybershot T2!

I lost it in a taxi in Dubai, way back in December.

And can I please have them with all my pictures back? They kinda mean alot to me.

So if you see anyone around uni using a silver Lumix in a red casing, or if someone is asking you for a Lumix camera battery charger, please please ask them about the camera? Thank you so so so much.

LoVe~

MzP<3

All You Need is Love

It's that time of the semester again.

You know, when the stoners put away their weed.

And the drunkards do not buy more beer.

And the party-ers stay home on Thursday, Friday AND Saturday nights.

Finals.


Honestly, no matter how bad of a reputation you have in uni, or how wild everyone perceive you to be, I'm pretty sure this is the most terrifying part of the semester for you. It's like life halts to a stop. When the nerds become nerdier. And the rest just shake in fear, and wish they were nerds in the first place.

It's the time Gavin does not come out of his room. At all. Not even to go to the gym. O.O

And for me?

I'm the one in denial. While everyone else is in the library the whole day and camping outside at nights (to ensure they get seats in the morning), I'm at home. Sleeping. For some reason, I don't freak out. Nono, not because I'm prepared. (Helloooo, have you seen my partying pics on FB?) And not because it doesn't matter to me either. It's just... I don't know. It's like I have some kind of freedom from worry or something. Which is bad!

Right now, it's almost 5am. I'm not sleeping yet. Because I couldn't sleep, not because I was studying. And it's annoying. My insomnia this past few months has been horrifying. Falling asleep takes forever. And if I fall asleep too easily, it can be guaranteed I'll wake up 2 hours later, not being able to fall back asleep until, say 7am. It's just annoying.

I never study anyway. It's like this thing. My thing. I don't always get away with it. And when I don't, it's just disastrous. But see, I get away with it too many times. Back in boarding school, after I get my results, my friends usually say, "Wow, I never see you study!!"

It's a blessing I guess. And a curse as well. Because I get very much broken when things go wrong as a result of it. So yeah, you might be thinking, wow, if I don't study my results are still alright, I would get amazing results if I DO study. Nope, not the case. You know the saying that goes, you only need 10% of your effort to reach 90%, but you'll need the 90% to reach the next 10%. Or something like that. That's just the thing. I only put 10% in everything. Because 90% is good for me. Hell, it's amazing. LOL. Just kidding.

Actually, I would put it on luck. I am a lucky person, enough said. The little I do remember from classes would get tested in exams. I would win small prizes in scratchies. I would be arranged to sit the same table with my crush at a big formal dinner. My chances to win in a bet are high. Just lucky. Granted, the rain does not stop for me. And there are days when everything goes wrong. But I go through months or years where the good things far outweigh the bad. No, life is not easy, I give you that. I'd say, it is overall, pleasant.

Only one thing though. I cannot do something wrong. Which means that, every single time I do wrong - say, deliberately lie to bring someone down, or maybe steal, or cheat on exams, or just hide something I shouldn't, or not listen to my mom - I would get punished for it, pretty bad. Not that I would do any of the above mentioned anyway. :P

However 2010 has not been one of those exceptionally lucky years. I have to work for my luck abit more. So yeah, I'd better sleep now so I can study tomorrow. Wish me luck!


By the way, San and I signed up to volunteer for Daffodil Day on the 27th of August. We will be in Mac Centre from 9-5 spreading awareness of cancer, and selling stuff you can buy to donate a lil' for the cause. Check it out here: http://www.daffodilday.com.au/ I will see you there!!

There's nothing you can make that can't be made.

No one you can save that can't be saved.

Nothing you can do but you can learn how to be you

in time - It's easy.

All you need is love, all you need is love,

All you need is love, love, love is all you need.

LoVe~

MzP<3

Magnificent Beauty

My favourite colour is pretty much common knowledge. If you didn't know let me give you a hint:

http://fuckyeahpink.tumblr.com/

But I'll bet you did not know my other favourite things. Like my second favourite colour (that's a hard one to guess, really). Or my favourite flower. Or my favourite song of all time. Or my favourite word. Or just my favourite food?

I'll tell you one thing then. No, I'll show you.

My favourite flower:

The Calla Lily. In my opinion, the most beautiful flower ever. It's beauty is in its simplicity. In its pureness. Its curve. I love it. It is also, unfortunately, pretty hard to get. Also pretty expensive.

Surprisingly my favourite flower is not the extravagant rose. Or maybe something sweet like daisies. But calla lilies attract me so much.

You know how roses have thorns? Bet you didn't know that calla lilies are poisonous. No, not just their stems, like roses, but every part of the plant. Yes including the flowers. And somehow that attracts me more. Knowing they are dangerous in all their simple beauty. And we're not talking a prick on a finger either. Poison.

And this I just found out. Their scientific name is Zantedeschia. Yes, it starts with a Z. My initial. How awesome is that?

The flower itself means 'magnificent beauty'.

*sigh*

LoVe~

MzP<3

Airplanes

Today will be a pretty good day. Tomorrow would be great! Actually this is a pretty awesome weekend when I think about it.

On thing to celebrate: My luck has returned!!!!!!!!! OMG this is by far the best news in a looooong time. Oh, don't worry, I didn't have to kiss anyone to get it back.

Although things are still not as good as I would like it to be, it's turning around. I am a lot more happier. I am  a LOT more healthier, that's for sure. And my depression is gone!

Turns out one of the BEST cure for depression I've ever come across, is to lose myself in pretty pictures. You know, pictures of things that are so pretty they make your hair rise and your toes curl. They make you forget about everything else for a moment, and truly make you believe the world is such a beautiful place that anything bad does not exist. (Or even if they do exist, they're not as bad anymore)

Try it: So Very Pretty!

I've spent hours and hours on the site, and every time, I'm transported to a place so beautiful I don't want to get out. I tell you (eventhough it sounds wayyy cliched) that everytime on the site, I thank God for every bad thing, and everything I had suffered for, because it makes me appreciate the world's beauty that much more. Love!!


Speaking of all this love and happiness and fairytale stuff, I wonder...


Sorry, that was just a moment. Moving on.

OMG I'm going to Melbourne right after my exams. No, we're not talking a week after. No, we're not talking a few days after. No, we're not even talking the next day. We're talking the same day my exam ends! No kidding. And soon after arriving, first destination: clubs!! We're talking, arrive, get picked up, and go clubs. Yes, we're awesome like that. Haha.

And then, get back to Sydney, and flyyy back to Malaysia the day after. Yay! Gosh, I love airplanes and flights and airports. I like all about them. Their smell, and the lighting and all the people in colourful uniforms. I even don't mind airplane food. What can I say, I grew up with them. Traveling has become a part of me over the years. For me, it's always the promise of it all. When you pack, and get ready, and get out of the house. When you get to the airport, you feel it. The anticipation. The promise of adventures or very familiar sights. Just knowing that when you get out of that plane, you're somewhere else entirely. It's the promise of people waiting for me.I would be alright if my job gets me to travel everyday. In fact I would love that.



And for the last thing I saved... my confession. I am having a crush on someone. Yes, someone. And that's all you're getting from me. But I could really use a wish right now. And this year, I just have 2 wishes: to graduate with good results. And him.

Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky

Are like shooting stars?

I could really use a wish right now.

Wish right now.

Wish right now...

LoVe~

MzP<3

TiK ToK

Today a guy told me: I broke up with my girlfriend last week. And then I realized I'd rather be with you than her.

Well. Why would someone put that much pressure on you? It's so hard for me when it comes to that.

Is he hot? Yeah, considerably. Is he fun? I would say so. So what's the problem? Problem is, he's a friend. I do not go out with friends. I can't like them.



So far 2010 has been good. More toned down, as in less partying. Less stupid young stuff. But it's been awesome all the same. And the big thing is, I've kept some of my New Year's resolutions. It's May, impressive right? I am proud of myself. Hehe.

The best part of it all? I am happy. Right now I would say I'm pretty depressed. But it's the happiest depressed state I've ever been in. Being happy even when depressed. Wow. Life must be good ey? Haha.

Bad news: My housemates are all boys now. Ugh.

Good news: Like a million friends!!

Life is moving on. I am truly happy, happier than I've ever been in a loooong time. I've been single for 7 months now... and loving it! I'm doing so good in uni, they claim I'm sleeping with the lecturer ;) Well, I won't admit I'm a nerd!! I've gone on adventures. Plenty spontaneous ones. Plenty awesome friends too! And yet time moves on, and moves and moves. Trust me this is going to be legendary!

My only regret is that I haven't been hanging out more with my Malaysian friends. Just, you know, not feeling it since most of them has left. I should try harder though. Circumstances don't allow it too much, but.

Signing out, loving life. As laid back, adventurous, crazy and spontaneous as it is. I wouldn't give it up for the world!

So sue me.

Now, the party don't start 'til I walk in

Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, I'mma fight
'Til we see the sunlight
Tick tock on the clock
But the party don't stop, no

LoVe~
MzP<3

Robot-ic

 

LoVe~
MzP<3

Guy on TV

I wish for you on a falling star

Wondering where you are

Do I ever cross your mind

In the warm sunshine

He's from the city of angels

Like Betty Davis, James Dean and Gable

Never know what he means to me

I fell for the guy that's on TV

Who is Your Ideal TV Boyfriend?

Heee. I did this quiz thingy and I got Michael Scofield. Seriously, he does sound very much like my ideal guy... But I don't watch Prison Break. Maybe I should start!

LoVe~

MzP<3

PIZZA!!!

 Seeing as I'm in a fun mode, let me share some laughs with you. : )

I actually got this from Yahoo! somewhere. It's really fun. And please please do tell me what happens when you actually try some of it.

(Oh and you know what makes it so much more fun? My brother was a pizza company phone operator. Muahahahaha)

So next time you order a pizza, make it a whole lot more fun! Try one of these. Maybe I have tried one or two... but I won't say which. ; )

Pickup your phone, call the pizza guy and...

Act like you know the order taker from somewhere. Say, "BedWetter’s Camp, right?"

Add extra letters to words, ex: pizza becomes pizzzzzzzaaaaaaa

After ordering, say, "I wonder what THIS button on the phone does." Simulate a cutoff.

Amuse the order taker with little-known facts about country music.

Answer their questions with questions.

Ask about pizza maintenance and repair.

Ask for a deal available somewhere else. (e.g., If phoning Domino's, ask for a Cheeser! Cheeser!)

Ask for chips/fries with everything!

Ask for extra homo-sapien

Ask for the guy who took your order last time.

Ask how many dolphins were killed to make that pizza.

Ask if the pizza has had its shots.

Ask if the pizza is organically grown.

Ask if them if they get a free date with one of the staff if you make order over $30.

Ask if they have any idea what is at stake with this pizza.

Ask if they would like to sample your pizza. Suggest an even trade.

Ask if they're familiar with the term "spanking a pizza." Make up a description to go with the term. Ask that this be done to your pizza.

Ask if you get to keep the pizza box. When they say yes, heave a sigh of relief.

Ask if you they can put food color in the cheese.

Ask the man/woman if they can sculpt the pizza into your favorite celebrity.

Ask them to not put a band-aid on it this time or you will sue.

Ask to see a menu.

Ask what the order taker is wearing.

Ask what their phone number is. Hang up, call them, and ask again.

Ask what topping goes best with well-aged Chardonnay.

Backwards pizza your order

Be vague in your order.

Belch directly into the mouthpiece; then tell your dog it should be ashamed.

Call to complain about service. Later, call to say you were drunk and didn't mean it.

Change your accent every three seconds.

Crack your knuckles into the receiver.

Dance all around the word "pizza." Avoid saying it at all costs. If (s)he says it, say, "Please don't mention that word."

Detect the order taker's psychic aura. Use it to your advantage.

Do not name the toppings you want. Rather, spell them out.

Doze off in the middle of the order, catch yourself, and say, "Where was I? Who are you?"

Eliminate verbs from your speech.

Engage in some serious swapping.

Get taker's name. Later, call exactly on the hour to say, "This is your time of day wake-up call, So-and-so." Hang up.

Give them your address, exclaim, "Oh, just surprise me!" and hang up

Haggle, HAGGLE, HAGGLE!!!!!!

Have a movie with a good car chase scene playing loudly in the background. Yell "OW!" when a bullet is fired.

Have your pizza "shaken, not stirred."

If (s)he suggests a side order, ask why (s)he is punishing you.

If any of the above practices are rejected by the order taker, say, in your best pouty voice, "Last guy let me do it."

If he/she suggests anything, adamantly declare, "I shall not be swayed by your sweet words."

If they repeat the order to make sure they have it right, say, "Okay, that'll be $10.99; please pull up to the first window."

If using a touch-tone press 9-1-1 every 5 seconds throughout the order.

If using a touch-tone, press random numbers while ordering. Ask the person taking the order to stop doing that.

If you live next door or on the same block as the pizza place, ask them to deliver with their pizza truck.

Imitate the order taker's voice.

Keep telling the order taker about the other pizza place you sued last year.

Laugh every minute or two, mention the cat in the microwave!

Learn the topping codes or abbreviations and use them instead of the name (e.g. pp instead of double pepperoni).

Learn to play a blues riff on the harmonica. Stop talking at regular intervals to play it

Make a list of exotic cuisines. Order them as toppings.

Make the first topping you order mushrooms. Make the last thing you say, "No mushrooms, please." Hang up before they have a chance to respond.

Make up a charge-card name. Ask if they accept it.

Move the mouthpiece farther and farther from your lips as you speak. When the call ends, jerk the mouthpiece back into place and scream GOODBYE at the top of your lungs.

Mumble, "There's a bomb under your seat." When asked to repeat that, say, "I said, 'sauce smothered with meat'."

Offer to pay for the pizza with a public flogging.

Order 52 pepperoni slices prepared in a fractal pattern as follows from an equation you are about to dictate. Ask if they need paper.

Order a Big Mac Extra Value Meal.

Order a one-inch pizza.

Order a slice, not a whole pizza.

Order a steamed pizza.

Order term life insurance.

Order two toppings, then say, "No, they'll start fighting."

Order using lines from different movies (Luke, I am your "customer"-Darth Vader)

Order while using an electric knife sharpener.

Order with a Speak-n-Spell where applicable.

Order your pizza, singing in falsetto!

Pass the phone around to everyone in the house -- have each person change the order a little.

Perfect a celebrity's voice. Stress that you won't take any crap from some two-bit can't-hack-it pimple-faced gofer.

Play a sitar in the background.

Psychoanalyze the order taker.

Put the accent on the last syllable of "pepperoni." Use the long "i" sound.

Put them on hold.

Rattle off your order with a determined air. If they ask if you would like drinks with that, panic and become disoriented.

Rent a pizza.

Repeat every third third word twice

Report a petty theft to the order taker.

Say hello, act stunned for five seconds, then behave as if they called you.

Say it's your anniversary and you'd appreciate if the deliverer hid behind some furniture waiting for your spouse to arrive so you can surprise him/her.

Say you'll be able to pay for this when the movie people call back.

Say-your-order-as-fast-as-possible.

Say, "Are you sure this is Pizza Palace? When they say yes, say, "Well, so is this! You've got some explaining to do!" When they finally offer proof that it is, in fact,
Pizza Palace, start to cry and ask, "Do you know what it's like to be lied to?"

Say, "Kssssssssssssssht" rather loudly into the phone. Ask if they felt that.

Sing the order to the tune of your favorite song from Metallica's Master of Puppets CD.

Spill out your life story and ask them to they understand, if they say yes, Scream "liars, I don't believe you!" and hang up! If they say no, repeat your story until they say yes.

Start the conversation by reciting today's date and saying, "This may be my last entry."

Start the conversation with "My Call to Pizza Palace, Take 1, and. . . action!"

Start your order with "I'd like. . .". A little later, slap yourself and say, "No, I don't."

State your order and say that's as far as this relationship is going to get.

St-tt-t-utter, b-b-bb-badly

Stutter on the letter "p."

Teach the order taker a secret code. Use the code on all subsequent orders.

Tell the order taker a rival pizza place is on the other line and you're going with the lowest bidder.

Tell the order taker to tell the manager to tell his supervisor he' fired.

Tell the order taker you're depressed. Get him/her to cheer you up.

Tell them to double-check to make sure your pizza is, in fact, dead.

Tell them to put the crust on top this time.

Terminate the call with, "Remember, we never had this conversation."

Try to talk while drinking something, gurgling into the phone.

When listing toppings you want on your pizza, include another pizza.

When ordering a pizza, burst out in tears every two minutes

When the order is repeated, change it slightly. When it is repeated again, change it again. On the third time, say, "You just don't get it, do you?"

When they repeat your order, say, "Again, with a little more OOMPH this time."

When they say, "What would you like?"--say, "Huh? Oh, you mean now."

When you're given the price, say, "Ooooooo, that sounds complicated. I hate math."

When ordering, don’t use prepositions (the, as, on, is, if…so on)

When ordering, mix up your sentence – “Pizza Palace hello there is this?” and so on. 

Even if you're not going to do any of these, it's still quite a laugh to read isn't it? Here's hoping you'll laugh throughout the day!!

 XOXO


LoVe~
MzP<#

My Dick

I just like this song! Battle it out cos My Dick is the shitz!! Heheeee.

My dick cost a late night fee
Your dick got the HIV
My dick plays on the double feature screen
Your dick went straight to DVD

My dick - bigger than a bridge
Your dick look like a little kid's
My dick - large like the Chargers, the whole team
Your shit look like you fourteen

My dick - locked in a cage, right
Your dick suffer from stage fright
My dick - so hot, it's stolen
Your dick look like Gary Coleman

My dick - pink and big
Your dick stinks like shit
My dick got a Caesar do,
Your dick needs a tweezer, dude

My dick is like super size
Your dick look like two fries
My dick - more mass than the Earth
Your dick - half staff, it needs work

My dick - been there done that
Your dick sits there with dunce cap
My dick - V.I.P.
Your shit needs I.D.

It's time that we let the world know
Dude, you gotta let your girl go
D.S. is the best in the business
P.S. we got dicks like Jesus

It's time that we let the world know
Dude, you gotta let your girl go
D.S. is the best in the business
P.S. we got dicks like Jesus

My dick need no introduction
Your dick don't even function
My dick served a whole lunch -in
Your dick - it look like a munchkin

My dick - size of a pumpkin
Your dick look like Macaulay Culkin
My dick - good good lovin'
Your dick - good for nothin'

My dick bench pressed 350
Your dick couldn't shoplift at Thrifty
My dick - pretty damn skippy
Your dick - hungry as a hippie

My dick don't fit down the chimney
Your dick is like a kid from the Philippines
My dick is like an M16
Your dick - broken vending machine

My dick parts the seas
Your dick farts and queefs
My dick - rumble in the jungle
Your dick got touched by your uncle

My dick goes to yoga
Your dick - fruit roll -up
My dick - grade -A beef
Your dick - Mayday geek

My dick - sick and dangerous
Your dick - quick and painless
My dick - 'nuff said.
Your dick loves Fred

It's time that we let the world know
Dude, you gotta let your girl go
D.S. is the best in the business
P.S. we got dicks like Jesus

It's time that we let the world know
Dude, you gotta let your girl go
D.S. is the best in the business
P.S. we got dicks like Jesus

It's by Mickey Avalon. How awesome is the song?!? It's so out there with Jizz In My Pants.



LoVe~
MzP<3

The Remedy

OK, now I'm starting to really regret this. What the hell is wrong with me in not being able to keep my MOUTH shut?!?

This wasn't supposed to get out yet. It wasn't supposed to be discussed. It was supposed to be an exclusive fabulous one time event. A formal, official thing that happens rarely enough to be celebrated once in 5 years!

Now I fell like my efforts are gone to waste. But I shan't be dramatic. Indecision is for the weak. I'm supposed to think on my feet. I'm supposed to make important decisions quickly and painlessly. Gosh I would suck if I'm running an entire corporation, if I can't even run 60 people. Now that it's official that people are just looking and waiting for me to fall flat on my face, I am terrified and terrorized to bits.

Oh God, I only did this as a volunteer thing. I am not expecting to be paid out of this. I am not expecting return of any kind. I am not even expecting gratefulness or friendliness. In fact, I don't even mind if people don't know about this at all. I am perfectly comfortable doing my job like this, making sure it runs smoothly rather than actually getting the fame out of this.

Oh well, wish me luck! I need a remedy.

The remedy is the experience.
This is a dangerous liaison
I say the comedy is that it's serious.
This is a strange enough new play on words
I say the tragedy is how you're gonna spend
The rest of your nights with the light on
So shine the light on all of your friends
When it all amounts to nothing in the end.
 


MzP<3

Crazy

I'm actually trying to avoid saying what I really wanna say. Well, because it will come out mean and terrible, and I would know that that's the PMS talking, not me.

Is everybody going crazy?

To summarize, I won't say I'm sad, cos I'm not. Perhaps pissed off, but not irrationally so. I'm just... done, you know. I refuse to be the victim here. And I won't be. I am, for all intents and purposes, detaching myself. Because the only things we humans are tied to, are our promises. The way I see it, I let this happen to myself anyway. (Just one thing I want to really clear out: I have family too you know, and I would have been able to spend time with them if I'm not waiting for you the whole day, to get a call 6 hours after, telling me you're NOT COMING. That's for the one who even bothered to call. And apologies on FACEBOOK?? Please. And that's for the one who even bothered to apologize.)

I realized this, when this one nice thing happened to me today, and I was not dying to call someone to tell them.

Is anybody gonna save me?

So, I was venue hunting for this big... event I'm planning. (And I won't ruin the surprise yet, so no details here) I found some good places, but I'm still torn. What do you do if you're undecided? To follow tradition, or to create my own? To take a risk, or to play it safe? To make it formal, or casual? I feel like I'm wayyy over-thinking it. I should just let it play out, right? And we'd all have fun anyway. But then, it IS a special night, and I'm sort of obliged to make it live up to expectations. Maybe it's crazy that that I'm doing this all by myself, but I don't see a single person who would volunteer to sacrifice themselves like this. But then again, it's good experience. I'm not the victim right? I pretty much did this to myself when I volunteered for the job.

Can anybody tell me what's going on?

Oooh. Do you know what this means??? Since I started this thing, I am, like, the PIONEER of, like, everything. How stupendously cool is that!! I am sooo going to give myself an awesome title. I totally deserve it. Something like, Executive Producer. Wow, now we're talking.

Wait a minute, this job is not just fun and games, you know. The really hard part, is having to organize this allll the way from Sydney. Like, that's hard. I have yet to figure out how to do it efficiently. You know, it's not like I can just drive there in an emergency situation. I need an in-between, someone who can do the job when I'm not around.

Tell me what's going on

Saying that, hmm, what do you think of the title Impresario. Nice. Like, awesome. I sound like I'm organizing the Opera or something artistic like that. Haha.

Do you know something? Whenever I write or talk in English, I've always been crippled by how some Malays words are just not translatable. And I cannot, try as I might, find a similar word in English. And even worse, I cannot even explain the word in English without using too many words.And that kind of sucks, because some Malay words are pretty nice. Like words? Like...

Geram. Well, this has one meaning in Malay, but has two translations in English. One of which is being mad. And even that is a rough translation. People always mis-translate it to mean 'a condition', when it's actually a feeling. It's a feeling you have when you feel angry, but it's also a feeling you have when you see something really cute and you just feel like pinching its cheeks but can't. I always wish they have this word in English. Or maybe my vocab is too limited. But if you know this word, please tell!

Merajuk. The only sort-of equivalent word in English is 'upset'. But the thing is, it is not exact. It means being upset in a cute-like way. Sort of playfully. Something like that. Sort of like sulking. Usually it's used on kids. Then maybe it's also used on boyfriends and girlfriends for the 'cute' thing. I mean, otherwise, how do you tell your boyfriend you're upset, but not seriously upset, just a little bit?

Mengada. Well. This word, I just don't know how to explain AT ALL. Or maybe too lazy to put it in words. Perhaps it means something like being 'Princessy'. But seriously, I can't explain it fully. And if anyone of you can explain it, or better yet, find an equivalent English word for it, do enlighten me and the rest of us. Haha.

If you open your eyes

Seriously, I really really believe that The Malay language is exceptionally beautiful. From what I've read from literature and such. But I also believe the language is the hardest to master. I mean, English is my 2nd language, and it's so much easier for me to be good at, rather than Malay. But, I'd say that Malay is the easiest language to learn the basics. It's freaking easy, in fact too easy, to learn enough to understand and be understood. Sometimes I wish the world could see the beauty of the language the way I see it. True experts of the language are becoming less and less these days. It's quite sad isn't it? Maybe the world should recognise the language, just enough to give motivation to the next generations to master it. If not, I really don't want to be a part of a dull language being suited to the times, and losing it's beauty. Malaysia goes through alot of globalisation. But please, I beg you, don't globalize my language.

You'll see that something is wrong.

LoVe~
MzP<3

I'm Only Happy When It Rains

So, how do you like my new blog?

Pretty dark huh?

I guess this is partly Xuxa's doing. But not all Xuxa though. If I let it be all Xuxa, the page will be filled with vampires. And not the sparkly Edward Cullen kind either. We're talking vicious vampires with blood dripping on their fangs, and torn gothic dresses. Yes, I can be that dark.

But lately I realised I've let Xuxa out again. I've been listening to angry songs. And metal songs actually seem enjoyable. This coming from someone who had migraines listening to them before. I've also taken a liking to Garbage songs. I can't believe I've never liked them before. Hmm...


Yeah, I would say I need the toughness alot more now. Maybe it's just one more of the phases of growing up. Maybe I'm growing up. In fact what I wouldn't give to redecorate my room black and red right now. How awesome would that be?

(OK, I'm actually worried about myself right now. I love pink!)

Interesting. I can't remember the last time I am more Xuxa than me. It kind of scares me. Because I'm ruthless as Xuxa.

As Herman Hesse said:
 "You know quite well, deep within you, that there is only a single magic, a single power, a single salvation... and that is called loving. Well then, love your suffering. Do not resist it, do not flee from it. It is your aversion that hurts, nothing else."



I guess embracing Xuxa in my time of plight is my way of loving my suffering. For only when I suffer I could fully be the other side of me, the darker part.




And these are the times I'll be needing it most.


Tomorrow I'm going to visit my old school, KYS. I'm seriously torn. Part of me wants to, out of curiosity, and mild obligation. Part of me is dreading it. Perhaps more than I am willing to admit. Those weren't the best years of my life, as you would have guessed. Yeah, I wasn't one of the girls who peaked in high school. I was one of those who can't wait to get out. And I'm glad I did too. Look how awesome my life is right now? Haha. I'm just being annoying. My life is pretty awesome, but still not void of suffering.


But then again, I'm a little girl who likes pink. Probably grew up with unicorns and rainbows. And parents who spoil me rotten. What do I know of suffering?


Haha. That's a secret I will NEVER tell. After all, the trick about life is to make it look easy.

I only smile in the dark

My only comfort is the night gone black

I didn't accidentally tell you that

I'm only happy when it rains

You'll get the message by the time I'm through

LoVe~

MzP<3

That's what Girls Do

You know what's the problem with men? They have to understand everything.

Listen, there are some things we don't have to understand. Some things we don't even have to know. That's life. We all know that. We don't fully understand life after death, for example, but we believe it's there.


My point is, STOP trying to understand women!!

I mean seriously, what is there to understand? A woman is a person. You need to know one individually.

Until now I don't get some men who goes: I have lived years and I still don't know what women want.

Well, of course you don't know. That's just stupid. I mean, have you asked yourself what men want? Women don't ask that question in the first place. So we don't have 'unanswered' questions about men in general.

It's just plain stupid to me.





If women are supposed to be less rational and more emotional at the beginning of our menstrual cycle when the female hormone is at its lowest level, then why isn't it logical to say that, in those few days, women behave the most like the way men behave all month long? – Gloria Steinem


Well we're not so different, women and men. But individually, one woman differs to another as much as a man differs to a woman. So yeah. Stop figuring us out as a GROUP, and do it individually instead.


Men. (Hahahahahaha. I'm just trying to prove a point here. Hehe)



Well, if you still want to group us, stop trying to figure it out. Just accept everything we do as, That's what girls do. Hehe.

You ask me why I change the colour of my hair

You ask me why I need 32 pairs of shoes to wear

You seem to ask me why I got alot of things

It's just a chick thing

You oughta let it go

LoVe~

MzP<3 

New Divide

Let me speak my mind for abit.

I hate this. Being back n Malaysia. Yes, I know I don't sound very patriotic right now. But being here is not fun. I'm not learning anything. And it's not very healthy either.

I know I don't have that many friends here. But even so, I thought I had some. Where are you guys? Too busy? Or just can't be bothered?

I'm so sick of initiating contact. I'm so sick of asking people out when they never do (ask me out). I mean, am I missing something here? Is this the way of life here? Or is it just that I'm not part of their lives enough for them to bother?

I hang out abit sometimes, but with my Sydney friends! What's the point of me coming back to Malaysia then? I would accomplish wayyyyy more in Sydney. In terms of a JOB, friends, company, and also productivity! AND I'll eat healthier. And I could have dates without my dad questioning everything. I would be at least 3kg thinner. And did I mention I have so much more friends?

And you wonder why I'm not dying to go back to Malaysia after I graduate.

Here, my spontaneity is sucked dry. I can't just call someone and meet them somewhere in 15 mins. I can't just wake up and decide I'm going to the beach today. I can't just go to the UBar knowing I will meet someone, anyone, there. And I sure as hell can't just talk to random strangers. First, they'll think I'm crazy. Second, my parents NEVER let me go out alone. Like, EVER. NEVER EVER. If I tell them I wanna go out to drink coffee, they'll make a HUGE deal out of it. "Wait, you're going ALONE??" or "Who are you going with?" or "Your father is going that way, why don't you go with him?" Like hello???? Nooooooo thank you.

Helloooo, it's just coffee! I'm pretty sure I won't end up in an alley with some psycho killer who just escaped from prison. Or run away to elope in Thailand. There's no hidden, dark alley in my area anyway. And I don't have a boyfriend, let alone a prospective husband. They watch too much TV sometimes.

And guys asking me out on dates? None of that. And the worst part is, I just realised a few days ago that I'll be here for Valentine's Day. How awesome is that? (That was sarcasm btw, if you still don't get my intended inflection)

Well excuse me while I get killed softly.





But honestly, today, I have a reason to miss Malaysia. More specifically, a person. A person who reminds me who I am. A person never too busy to spend time with me. A rare person who is here.

Maybe Malaysia might not be so bad after all. And yes, I'm going to miss the whole country because of him. Thank God there's someone like him. If not, you guys should be ashamed of yourselves. Malaysians. *Scoff*

So give me a reason to prove me wrong, to wash this memory clean
Let the floods cross the distance in your eyes
Give me reason to fill this hole, connect this space between
Let it be enough to reach the truth that lies across this new divide

Basically, prove me wrong about this difference between my two worlds. And give me a reason to believe that it is all not that different, and to let me find the connection between them. And let that reason be enough to find my purpose here. Give me a reason to come back, across this new divide.



LoVe~
MzP<3

The Resolution

When the new year came around, I did have a few resolutions. And this time, I will stick to them.

My resolutions this year, summed up, is basically to continue all the good things I did last year, and to stop all the bad things.


I will try to date a guy that my mom approves of. Which is hard, and almost impossible, but I will try really hard.

I will continue to resist alcohol. I will not drink. I will not taste it. And I will not be convinced by my friends to have some.

I will study. Extremely hard to do, but I will. From week 1.

I will get a job. Something good, since it's my last year in uni, I can get something pretty good. I hope.

(This resolution is not written here because it's private and personal, but don't worry, it's something good. And Dee, don't laugh!!!)

I will organize a big reunion. Honestly, I have no idea how I'm going to do this, but I am.

I'm going to lose at least 3 kg, and maintain that weight! Which means, continue exercising. And go on healthy diets. No more crash diets.

I'm going to continue being a vegetarian. Super challenging, but obtainable. (I will not be a vegetarian if it results in wastage, since I'm doing it for the environment anyway)

I'm going to party less. I'm not 21 anymore. Got to be more responsible.



See? Awesome. Lots of stuff I'm going to ensure will happen in 2010. I'm so proud of myself.

And now that I've published it for the world to see, I can't back out!!! So wish me truckloads of luck. And hope that I will go through whats going to be a tough year.

Tomorrow back from hell
Resolution
Some stories I will never tell
Resolution
And yeah, I'm almost home

LoVe~
MzP<3

Through the Rain

Two weeks into the year, and everything is going wrong. Everything I know is falling apart. Everything that was so beautiful in the last year is now falling apart, crumbling in my wake. And I'm standing, just a spectator, watching but not able to do anything about it.

It's my birthday today, did you know?

I feel like I've been sucked through a large hole, dark enough and black enough that nothing could be seen, and nothing is within reach.

It would be usual for me to know feelings like this don't last. It's just a blip of darkness against a canvas of overwhelming beauty, which in a way, needs to be there to complete the picture.

But I also know there holes so deep to fall in that you will never get out again, in darkness, where light is just a memory held so dear by the thought alone. With a hope that fades away with every creeping day.

In a way, I feel I have fallen. And I don't know if I'm getting out. But it is a deep hole. Engrossing me with darkness.


But then maybe I'm just walking through the rain. Heavy enough to obscure my vision, enveloping the sight of all good things that surround me, and all good things to come. Maybe the rain will stop. Maybe I'll see everything clearly again.

The rain will always stop, right? I just have to be strong enough to endure it, to go through it.

I can make it through the rain,
I can stand up once again,
On my own and I know,
That I'm strong enough to mend.

And every time I feel afraid,
I hold tighter to my faith,
And I live one more day,
And I'll make through the rain.

But being a troubled person, I know very well what is happening. I'm having some kind of anxiety problem right now. I'm extremely anxious. I can't sit still the whole day. I can't sleep. I can't seem to clear my head of the fact that something bad may happen. My heart is racing, I have a problem concentrating in anything I do, I've been fidgeting non-stop. It feels bad.


But I'm on MSN with Julie right now. And if there is one person in this world who could make me feel better, it's her. No one understands me as much as she does. And I love her for it.



So wish me luck to make it through the rain one more time.


LoVe~
MzP<3

Non Dairy Creamer

I have this thing. This little problem, right, where I always try to see the best in people.

No, it does not mean I trust easily. (And I really don't). It's just that, you know, when you grow up and you meet more people, and after a while you stumble across a personality type that's proved problematic before, when other people would write him/her off, I'd usually be the one who'd believe that he/she could work that personality positively.

I used to refuse to believe that there are truly bad people in this world. I mean, who in their right mind would deliberately hurt someone or something? Who in their right mind would do something bad without his/her own reasons? After all, the world is not black & white.

But then, of course I'm wrong. There are people who would hurt others deliberately. There are others who thrive on being so wrong. (I would love to get in their head sometime and know how they became so screwed up). But these people are rare enough. Rare enough that I know I can still trust every new person I meet to be good. (But yet, still not trust them completely)



And then there are lies. I know very well about lies. I receive them alot. I give them out sometimes. Lies are so abundant out there, it's everywhere. We know our parents lie to us about their past, our teachers lie to us about their present, and our politicians lie to us about the future.

But the abundance of lies does not mean the truth does not exist. It always does. There is such a thing as truth. We do have to work to find it, but it's there. Always.

And yes I always assume people always seek the truth.


This is what I'm getting at. There are people. These people, a very rare few, who are infused with lies. These are the people I understand very little of. I just don't know why they lie, and lie. I just don't have any clue as to what's in their head, that prompts them to lie all the time.

And in my opinion these people are one of the worst. They have the worst personality types.

Admit it, there are no movies about them, no proper stories told of them. I don't think people really see it as a serious problem. I mean, I'm not talking about the Schizo. I'm talking about healthy, sane people.

What I don't get is, do they actually see their life that way? Do they actually believe what they talk about? Are they that delusional? Or do they deliberately lie to make themselves look and sound better? And if so, don't they realise people are not stupid? They know.

You know these people, you would probably come across at least one of them. The one who claims they have many friends, when they don't. The one who claims alot of guys/girls like him/her and stalk him/her when it's the other way around. The one who would tell bad stories to you about other people so that you won't like them and like him/her instead. The one who tells you they get a D average when he/she is a P average. The one who keeps describing their 'amazing' house to make them look rich, when their house is just average.

And no, I'm not talking about a person who lies about one of these things, but a person who lies about all of them. Like, they create their lives for other people to see, but they live very different lives. Don't they know people will find out eventually? Don't they know it doesn't make them look or sound cool, just a liar? I mean, what are their aims exactly? To be the envy of others? I don't see it. It just doesn't make sense to me.

And being surrounded by lies all the time, I should know, the best lies are the ones given out sparingly. The ones that are so rare that people won't see them coming.

Take poker for instance. Bluff sparingly, and people won't see it coming.

So what's it gonna be?
Are you real to me?
Or are you non dairy creamer.

LoVe~
MzP<3