I certainly did some really weird things today. You know, not too weird, but weird enough. During Bio paper 5, I actually wrote a poem. A poem, people. 3 whole verses. Just because I finish the paper too early and have no idea what to do. It's actually a good poem if I say so myself. Honestly, that wasn't the first time. I also wrote a poem during an SPM paper last 2 years and that poem was longer. I have to say, these 2 poems are the best I've ever wrote. But I never let anyone read them, I'll just throw them away, my words being lost forever because I don't remember them. Guess it's true what they say about getting creativity when you're unhappy. I mean, I'm certainly unhappy during exams right, so I write amazingly good poems.
Me writing a poem wasn't exactly the weirdest thing happening in the exam hall. Apparently, a certain Superwoman did weirder. She wrote a long list of English words and their opposites. I guess, you never can beat a Superwoman, even in terms of weirdness. I mean, even the only person who tops her in MRSness is Aimi (and that goes without question).
Today is also a most depressing day. What with me struggling with Statistics and all. But enough about exams, lets talk about the real deal. So what is so devastatingly, horribly and frustratingly depressing? It is the fact that my 1.5 year crush has a girlfriend. A new girlfriend. Whom he apparently 'loves'. Feel my pain now? It gets worse: he was actually looking for a girlfriend in about a year or so when I was there, having a major crush on him. I'm talking major heart-beats-faster and head-in-clouds kind of major crush. Even worse, I think he deserves better(read: he deserves me!!!). And the ultimate worst? He has a sooooo much better personality than I thought. Basically, my ultimate Dreamguy. He's the dreamiest dream I've ever dreamed. He's like mini-marshmallows-dipped-in-caramel-and-Belgium-chocolate dreamy. And he's also the dream that completes my nightmare. Boo Hoo Hoo. Now I undarstand JLo when she sings, "And when I'm feeling sexy, who's gonna comfort me?" By the way, he is the one who inspired the abovementioned poem. Only a crush could make you feel all hopeless romantic and old fashioned.
I can read your mind. They're so loud, I can hear them. I can read your speech bubbles. You know, "What about your BF/exBF/Husband?" Am I right? Of course I am(yay me). Okay, first of all, he's not my husband!!! He's not. Not even fiancee. Stop rolling your eyes! He's not, I tell you. I'm not in denial. I should know if I'm married.
Can I answer your question now (when you've stopped rolling your eyes and can actually read)? Okay, my answer is: I guess I'm stuck with him. For another period of my lifetime. If he's not everything, at least he's one thing: He's not a dream that can turn into a nightmare. And thats' what I really need in life right?
Muahx.
LoVe~
MzP<3>
03 May 2007
Looking For a Reason
The song you've been most singing to
yourself recently?
~ Girlfriend by Avril Lavigne. Some older ones like 'There you'll Be'. And some of my orchestra songs. Really missed them.
What do you currently want right now?
~ To get out of this house. I just don't like to live with too much lies and pretense with my family members. I like to be away because absence makes the heart grow fonder. I can't miss them if I see them all the time.
What did you do today?
~ Nothing. Study and study. Then I played with my brothers. And with my cats.
Are you hungry? What would you like?
~Nope. Not at all. Just ate pizzas. Yum.
Who have you been thinking about most
today?
~My BF/exBF. I was wondering if he really meant what he said last night. And if he called but I'm too coward to switch my phone on because i might face disappointment. Again.
Do you ever just sit outside and watch
the stars?
~ Yes, in KYS last time where there are lots of stars. Can't really see stars in the city. Because of some twisted pollution thingy. It's a physics thing involving light wavelenghts and things like that.
Do you do a lot of surveys? Why?
~ Only when I'm in the mood. Because I have no idea what else to write in my blog.
What is your current annoyance?
~ My brother. Hogging the computer all day and all night.
Do you want a new cell phone?
~ Not now. My phone's pretty new. And I love it to bits. Wish it has more functions though.
Are you waiting for someone right now?
~ Maybe. I mean, he doesn't know. I was just hoping for him to come/call.
What time are you going to bed?
~ I don't know. Really.
Name one thing you're looking forward to
this week?
~ Tomorrow I think. When I get to go to Ruums. First time out for a month.
Are you planning on visiting some old
friends?
~ Not in the near future. Exams coming. Maybe after exams.
Can you make new friends easily?
~ Depends. Usually, no. But somehow if it's my first day somewhere really, new, I will make friends easier than I think. I think it's the prospect of 'New Beginnings'.
What would you do if your best friend
turned gay/lesbian?
~ Nothing. Live and let live, I say. I understand if my girl friend says she's a lesbian that she won't exactly automatically like me. In fact, I'd like a gay friend.
Has anyone ever told you "You dropped
your pocket", and you looked down
looking for it?
~ No. My friend lost her SIM once and I said, "Why don't you call?" And she actually did!
What is music to you?
~ Some really nice sounds. Really, I can't live without music. In all the chaos of aeroplanes, construction, my brother's shouts, it's very welcoming to plug in something nice in your ear. I guess that's music, an escape. The Sweet Escape.
How many times do you eat each day?
~ Three. Usually I skip breakfast. And sometimes I'd eat for tea. I don't snack much unless I have someone to do it with.
How do you cheer someone up?
~ A hug. I like to say: You need a hug! Or sometimes I'll ask, "Doy you need a hug?" Then I'll hug them. If it's because of exams, I'll say,"Don't worry, whatever you did badly, I did worse." And it's usually true.
Are you a morning person?
~ No. I was when I was younger and there was something to wake up to in the morning, you know, when chickens still exist in KL and the morning air is so clean it feels like someone scrubbed it. And when my grandmother's still alive and she'd be watering the plants outside. Nowadays I'm a night person. Nightlife is just so much more interesting.
Is it easier for you to fall asleep or
to be woken up?
~ Fall asleep. I never get enough sleep and by the end of the week I'd be collecting at least 5 hours worth of sleep. So I'll easily sleep.
Are you a picky person?
~ Yes and no. Depends on what the choices are. If we're talking future husband here, I have very specific requirements. You know you gotta plan the future.
Seriously, do you know how to dance?
~ Choreographed? Nope. But I can always shake my booty! And that's usually enough for life!
Do you think its funny when people get
hurt?
~ Only if the situation's funny. But most of the time, no. Light injuries, like finger cramps, can be funny.
yourself recently?
~ Girlfriend by Avril Lavigne. Some older ones like 'There you'll Be'. And some of my orchestra songs. Really missed them.
What do you currently want right now?
~ To get out of this house. I just don't like to live with too much lies and pretense with my family members. I like to be away because absence makes the heart grow fonder. I can't miss them if I see them all the time.
What did you do today?
~ Nothing. Study and study. Then I played with my brothers. And with my cats.
Are you hungry? What would you like?
~Nope. Not at all. Just ate pizzas. Yum.
Who have you been thinking about most
today?
~My BF/exBF. I was wondering if he really meant what he said last night. And if he called but I'm too coward to switch my phone on because i might face disappointment. Again.
Do you ever just sit outside and watch
the stars?
~ Yes, in KYS last time where there are lots of stars. Can't really see stars in the city. Because of some twisted pollution thingy. It's a physics thing involving light wavelenghts and things like that.
Do you do a lot of surveys? Why?
~ Only when I'm in the mood. Because I have no idea what else to write in my blog.
What is your current annoyance?
~ My brother. Hogging the computer all day and all night.
Do you want a new cell phone?
~ Not now. My phone's pretty new. And I love it to bits. Wish it has more functions though.
Are you waiting for someone right now?
~ Maybe. I mean, he doesn't know. I was just hoping for him to come/call.
What time are you going to bed?
~ I don't know. Really.
Name one thing you're looking forward to
this week?
~ Tomorrow I think. When I get to go to Ruums. First time out for a month.
Are you planning on visiting some old
friends?
~ Not in the near future. Exams coming. Maybe after exams.
Can you make new friends easily?
~ Depends. Usually, no. But somehow if it's my first day somewhere really, new, I will make friends easier than I think. I think it's the prospect of 'New Beginnings'.
What would you do if your best friend
turned gay/lesbian?
~ Nothing. Live and let live, I say. I understand if my girl friend says she's a lesbian that she won't exactly automatically like me. In fact, I'd like a gay friend.
Has anyone ever told you "You dropped
your pocket", and you looked down
looking for it?
~ No. My friend lost her SIM once and I said, "Why don't you call?" And she actually did!
What is music to you?
~ Some really nice sounds. Really, I can't live without music. In all the chaos of aeroplanes, construction, my brother's shouts, it's very welcoming to plug in something nice in your ear. I guess that's music, an escape. The Sweet Escape.
How many times do you eat each day?
~ Three. Usually I skip breakfast. And sometimes I'd eat for tea. I don't snack much unless I have someone to do it with.
How do you cheer someone up?
~ A hug. I like to say: You need a hug! Or sometimes I'll ask, "Doy you need a hug?" Then I'll hug them. If it's because of exams, I'll say,"Don't worry, whatever you did badly, I did worse." And it's usually true.
Are you a morning person?
~ No. I was when I was younger and there was something to wake up to in the morning, you know, when chickens still exist in KL and the morning air is so clean it feels like someone scrubbed it. And when my grandmother's still alive and she'd be watering the plants outside. Nowadays I'm a night person. Nightlife is just so much more interesting.
Is it easier for you to fall asleep or
to be woken up?
~ Fall asleep. I never get enough sleep and by the end of the week I'd be collecting at least 5 hours worth of sleep. So I'll easily sleep.
Are you a picky person?
~ Yes and no. Depends on what the choices are. If we're talking future husband here, I have very specific requirements. You know you gotta plan the future.
Seriously, do you know how to dance?
~ Choreographed? Nope. But I can always shake my booty! And that's usually enough for life!
Do you think its funny when people get
hurt?
~ Only if the situation's funny. But most of the time, no. Light injuries, like finger cramps, can be funny.
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