Flight Delay Part 4

22/09/08

OMG. Home sweet home. Right now I'm in my room. My beautiful new room. At home. It's just after sahur. I feel like I've finally clicked my heels 3 times and said, “There's no place like home.” When I actually longed to go home, when I actually finally wanted to, I got it. Beautiful. So that's how the land of OZ works. Haha.

OK. Story.

So, off the bus went to the airport. Reached there at 9am. That's 3 big buses folks.

Jap. Subuh.

We reached the airport, took our huge luggages and walked in to a check-in counter especially for us. There, we gathered round, waiting. That moment reminds me of school days. When I was a kid. It wasn't much different than. Standing around, having no clue what's going on. Fighting to get in the queue. Talking to each other animatedly. But what reminds me most is our clueless faces. Like, waiting to be told what to do. Helpless. Not being able to make our own decision. Just like in school. It was quite sometime we stood around, waiting for the check-in counter to open, looking forward to our 12 noon flight. Looking forward to reach our destinations.

Then the queue line opens. We were hustling and bustling, trying to be the first in line, with our big big bags and trolleys. Babies crying. So a line we formed, like school kids waiting for their turn.

And the wait started. They had not actually opened the counter, so we waited. And waited. And waited, Then someone came along. Announcement: The estimated time of the flight is now 6pm. Another delay! More groans. It is, after all, just 10am. I don't think anyone had 'Waiting in airport' on their agenda for 8 hours. By this time, everyone is defeated. Some got angry. Some sad. Some just stared ahead. Some prayed really hard. But I could see the dejected faces in all of them. The flight is now 28 hours delayed. Even I almost gave up. Life just couldn't be more cruel.

Just when I thought I would stay there forever, an announcement: From the delayed flight, anyone with KL as their final destination, please come forward to the service counter. Woo-hoo. Yay. I know there's another flight at 2pm that afternoon, and besides, I've waited in line for almost two hours anyway. So I went to the counter. “Oh, you're in First Class. OK, please wait, we'll try to get you a seat on the 2pm flight. Excitedly, I sat, waited, took out my laptop and wrote some blog. That was where I was when I wrote the last post, at the check-in counter.

So then, after another, say 45 minutes of waiting, they ushered me to the other check-in counter, where they said if I didn't mind, they could get me a seat in Business Class on the 2pm flight. *Pump fist in the air. Yay! Of course I didn't mind. As long as I actually get home, they can put me in the luggage storing area and I would be fine with that. And that's saying something because the luggage storing area has temperatures in the single digits. And that's cold.

Then I waited there. Standing. Then I heard, “Zulaikha!” That was Aideeni. She was in line for the same flight! Wow, what a small small world, huh. Well, it turns out, she's not the one going on the flight, but her friend is, and she's just there to accompany him. So I told her about the delayed flight, and the hotel and more delays. Well, she was... shocked. Like, unbelievable. I know. But then, she only knew part of the story. There's even more to come.

So there I waited until the very end, typing away on my laptop because I've seriously got nothing better to do than write the blog post. To top it off, I was soooooooo sleepy, I would've nod off any second. But I waited. So, at the very end, I went up to the counter again. The guy seemed busy, so I waited. Patiently. Too patiently. A woman went to check if I could get on. A guy, waiting for a seat too, was busy praying really hard next to me. Then, when I finally went up to the counter, there was a problem. A few calls made, some angry voices. Some blaming. Other staff looking on in pity. And then, guess what? The flight has closed. CLOSED. Can you believe that? I waited there for a whole hour just to find out that I'm not getting on the flight anyway, with no other reason than the stupid flight has closed. Told you I shouldn't have been too patient. The praying guy didn't get a seat either. They told me to go to the delayed check-in counter again, try to get on the delayed flight. The 6pm one.

That was when I just about gave up. I told myself, if this flight is delayed one more second, I'm not going home. I'd just get a train back to Macquarie and celebrate raya here in Sydney. It's not so bad, anyway. And that was my original plan anyway.

So. Again I waited. And waited. And then, they got me. Checked me in. Took my bag. Gave me a boarding pass. On the boarding pass, it wrote Departure: 18.00. OK, good. 6pm. At least that was something. And then (jeng jeng jeng), let's guess what happened. Yup. Guess. We're talking bad. We're talking amazingly ridiculous. The woman from before came up: “I've just got information and they're saying the flight is taking off at 8pm.” Fuck yea. No kidding. She actually said that. Remember me saying something about giving up? Yup. This is it. This is when I'm supposed to give up. But. I've already checked in, remember? Remember? My bag's with them. I've already got a boarding pass. There's no turning back now.

What the hell was I supposed to do? Shout? Cry? Throw a tantrum and spit in their faces? Noooooo. I just smiled. Said OK. And made my way to immigration. The scanner. That would be my second time going through the same scanner, for the same flight. Whatever. It's not like the contents of my bag changed anyway. It's not like I could obtain a hand bomb staying at the airport for hours like I did. My mood was so down, I couldn't even smile. Even when the guy behind the counter was trying to be friendly, asking me some questions, I just nod/shake my head, and answered in one word sentences. I was just thinking: Why the hell did I go through now? It's just a little pass 2pm. It's not like there's anything in there. Well, it's not like there's anything out there either, anyway. At least in there there's a seat in the lounge with my name on it. And I'm sooo sleepy. If I'm lucky I might get some shut eye. But then again, it'd be boring. Maybe I should call a friend to pick me up and go hangout somewhere and keep me company. Wait, no credit. No point anyway, I'm past the point of no return.

I got in. Past the duty free shops. I just stood around looking at things. Trying on perfumes, looking at gadgets, thinking if I should buy something. Wait, no money. Broke! Looking at chocolates. Thinking I should just buy something to break my tenner (only $$ I had) so I could call my parents on the public phone. Called my parents anyway, had a dollar coin. Just told my dad about the further delay, the new flight time, which wasn't even confirmed yet, got disconnected, not enough coins.

Made my way slowly to the First Class Lounge. Went to the lady behind the counter. “May I see your boarding pass please?” As soon as she saw the pass, her face changed. “What did they tell you about the flight?” she asked. I said, “They said it departs at 8pm.” She smiled and said (brace yourselves for the wash of pity that would come soooon.), “Well, now they're telling me it's departing at 9pm.” Whoosh. Yup, told ya the tidal wave of pity will come. Even she pitied me and volunteered to switch on the TV for me, telling me of Dancing With the Stars. Uhuh. Like any TV program could cheer me up at this time. I just smiled. Took my laptop. Sat wayyy back. Wrote some vulgar words on the blog post. You guys read that, huh. Sorry again. That was inappropriate. Frankly, I wasn't in the mood. At all. You understand right?

So, at 3pm, I sat on a nice comfy chair in the lounge. Watched another episode of One Tree Hill. Waiting patiently for buka puasa. When there are no more episodes to watch (downloading in progress), I listened to iTunes. Did I tell you the internet wi-fi wasn't working? Yup, no internet, but I guessed you figured it out since I had to put this up later.

I just made dumb and sat there. Trying hard not to kill myself. Oh well, what the hell would I use anyway? A knife? Or the hand bomb I snuck past security? Anyway. Buka puasa. 5.50pm. There's a nice drinks cooler and I took a can of lemonade. Aaah... refreshing. The lady came around and took my order. Beef noodles. Yum. It was soooo good. Finished the whole thing in, like, 5 minutes. The beef was just so juicy. I'm salivating now just thinking of it again.

After my buka puasa, I sat at the couch comfortably, and slept. That was a nice nap. I was just too tired. I just hoped I when I wake up, the flight isn't delayed another hour or two or five.

Hmm... Guys, it's morning now. I'll get some rest, than I'll continue. And then I'll try really hard to get an internet connection. Soon. So you can read this soon. Good night. I mean, in the figurative sense, anyway.

It's afternoon of the 22^nd of September. I just want to finish the story. In my beautiful room.

Where was I? Oh yea, the nap. I was woken up by the woman at the check-in counter previously. She was bustling around. She saw me awake, and asked if I'm tired. Asked a few questions. Told me to get some sleep if I'm tired.

I realised that I slept for quite awhile already. So I started pacing. What to do next? Thank God the flight time still hadn't changed. That was a relief. Went to the reception. Asked if there was a phone I could use to call my parents. You know, no credit, no coins and phone out of battery. Called my father. Engaged. Tried again. He didn't pick up. Called my mother. She didn't pick up. Oh well. Went back to my seat. Called my boyfriend. It was 8pm. He picked up and was like, “Hi Sayang!” He guessed it was me because if I got on the 12noon flight, I would've reached KL by then and would've called him. I was like, “Guess what? (Pause) I'm still in Sydney. In the airport. In the First Class Lounge. My flight got delayed again.” He was like, “Fuck, that's bad.” “I know.” Talked to him for awhile. God, I miss him so damn much. Considering we're still in the same country and state but couldn't see each other. Played games on the computer to while away the time. One game after another. I've got to tell you, it gets pretty old after a while, but it's not like there's anything else I can do.

And then. (Drumroll please) The lady came to me. You'll be boarding in 10 minutes. I said, “Finally.” Oh. My. God. OMG OMG OMG. It's actually happening. This flight is actually happening. I felt this huge weight, that I didn't even realise was there, being lifted off my shoulders. If I wasn't in the First class Lounge, I'd be jumping. Maybe. But at the same time, I was so freaking tired. Tried not to get my hopes up though. Just in case. So I asked to call my father again. Engaged. Gave up. The lady called and asked about the boarding, and they said it was in 5-10 minutes (well, they did say that 5 minutes ago, but oh well, as long as I'll be on that plane, and soon). Sat down, waiting for the time of boarding. Then, the lady rushed in, “Your mother is on the line.” Oh, about time! Talked to my father. Told him my flight would be at 9pm. I'd be boarding in a few minutes. And that I'd probably arrive at 3am in KL. He was like, “Don't worry. We'll still come and pick you up.”

The lady said, “You're boarding now.” Yay!!! Used the toilet. Said thanks and bye to the lady. Ran up to the gate (almost forgetting to ask the lady which gate it was, and she shouted it at me) and walked quickly into the gate, to the plane, before they change their mind (Seeing my luck lately) about letting me in.

Walked into the plane. It was the same cabin crew on board. They were enthusiastically welcoming me back. Turns out, I'm the only passenger in First Class anyway. Great. Good seat. Same menu. “But the food's fresher,” said a steward.

Sat back, buckled up, took out my lovely laptop, and continued my blog.

You know, that was heaven. I was so glad I'm actually on the plane. Finally. Finally. FINALLY. I felt this rush of feelings: glad, contented, happy, tired, and so so relieved. You have no idea. I was so glad to get to go home that the previous problem I had (The crying and stuff) just vanished. I mean, I don't care anymore if my parents literally locked me up in a cage for the whole two weeks. I get to go home. And it sure as hell is better than some airport.

Ate lamb as appetizer, chicken with coconut sauce and rice as the main dish, orange pannatone with vanilla sauce for dessert. Also some ice cream. And gourmet coffee with that. Slept. Reached KL at 3.30am. Got out at 4am after the baggage wait.

Everyone on the flight looked so tired and drained. After all, we were stuck at the airport for 12 hours.

Report.

Total time of delay: 31 hours. No kidding, mate. That was how long I had to wait for the flight. 31 bloody hours. Missed the kenduri at my house. Total time in airport on Sunday: 12 hours. Overall total time in airport: 18 hours. Bloody hell.

Guess it counts as an experience. After all, how many people out there can actually say they were on a flight that got delayed for 31 hours? Certainly not many.

XOXO

LoVe~

MzP<3

Flight Delay Part 3

9pm. 21 September 2008.

That is the time and date in my finally, finally, finally, FINALLY confirmed flight back to Malaysia.

In fact, I am in the plane right now. 10 more minutes to take off. I better pray hard that the plane actually leaves the ground this time.

What else could go wrong? I couldn't even imagine. If something else does go wrong, you wouldn't be reading this right now anyway. I wouldn't get the chance to post it on my blog.

Sooooooooooooo.

*Sigh. Finally. Finally finally finally.

I hope I'm not just dreaming I'm actually on a plane right now. I. Am. Actually. On. A. Plane!!! Like, I am finally going home. Never before in my entire life have I ever feel so damn glad that I'm on my way home. Even if it's just because I want to get out of the freaking airport. Been in there too long. OK. So, finally, the story of the delayed flight continues...

So we got into the bus. Got to eat my donuts, after 7pm. Waited for bus to be full. Hotel Mercure, here we come.

We reached the hotel between 7.30 and 8pm. Queued up for the room. Praying our rooms are good. Praying we get food. Planning how to call friends/relatives/colleagues/bosses about the unfortunate delay. Well, the queue was long, way out of the hotel doors. Reached the counter. Signed my name. Got a piece of paper explaining everything. “OK, you're on the 2^nd floor.”

From the piece of paper, it got me happy! We got dinner. And breakfast! (Although I realised a few hours later, puasa! No breakfast for me!) We got complimentary phone calls worth up to $30.00 (Well, the rates are really high so it's not as much as you think it is. It's like, 5 mins). Wake up call at 7.30am. Shuttle arrives 8.45am. I did wonder how much MAS had to spend for this delay. Must cost a fortune! I later asked my father and he said, “Easily 500,000. US dollars.” Wow.

Got up to my room. Nice room. Nice bed. Heaven. I realised that would be my first time being in a hotel room alone. By myself. I actually got kind of excited. I've grown up! I mean, enough to get to stay at a hotel without guardian! And that was my first time. And I didn't even have to pay for it! Yay. Lucky me. Well. I didn't know what was to come yet, did I.

Hold on. Plane taking off. Got to shut the laptop.

Yay! We're up in the air!!! Finally. OMG. You have noooo idea how happy and relieved and glad and contented and grateful and happy I am. And then the song My Way came on. OMG. Coincidence much?

So, continuation of the hotel room saga...

Made myself comfortable. Used the toilet. Finally get to call my parents. They were, like, “Good, you got a hotel room.” Great. Called my baby. He was so sweeeeeeet. He loves me, did I tell you that?

OK. Reality.

Dinner served at 9pm. Watched One Tree Hill, meanwhile. Went down to the restaurant for dinner. The food was... how do I put this mildly?... pleasantly bad. It's cold. Yea, I know what your thinking, OZ culture right? But you don't get it. The cold food is cold. The hot food are cold too. And not to mention, non-halal. Cold steamed vegetables and rice, anyone? *Gag. During dinner, we sat together and I found out that for a lot of them, their flight doesn't end in KL. They've got connecting flights waiting to get them to Paris or India or Rome. Some of them have missed their connecting flights, relying on the Airline to do their job and get them to their destinations as soon as possible. I pity them. They do have family and friends and meetings waiting. But, then again, I do have my family waiting as well.

Went back to my room. One Tree Hill. Well. Dot dot dot.

That night was great, and then 'shit', and then very very lovely. Well, I couldn't have asked for a better first time stay in a hotel. Slept late.

7.30am. Rrrrriiiinnnggggg. Telephone. Got up. Picked up. Got a machine saying some rubbish about wake up call. Went back to sleep. Too comfortable to get up. Phone alarm went off. 7.45am. Groan. Shuts eye. 8am. Got up. OMG. Rush!

Went down, checked out. Got on the bus. Felt sad.

Food's here. Continuation in progress...

10.40pm. Too full. Later OK. Eragon on TV!

You know what? I'll just start a new post next time. Tune in next time on my blog to know of the Flight Delay, part 4.

LoVe~

MzP<3

Flight Delay Part 2

21 September 2008

OK. Part two of the story.

Yes, I know, I thought the story has only one part too. Until... Well, just read the story.

Let's start with right now. So. A few minutes to 12 noon. Guess where I am? Let me give you a clue: Not Malaysia. Yup. I'm still in Sydney. Airport to be precise. At the check in counter. Waiting to be called, hopefully soon. So bored of waiting that I had to whip out my laptop to get to listen to some songs instead.

So yes, I still haven't gotten any access to the internet, so I can only put this up as soon as I do. By the time you read this, hopefully, I'll be back home safe in KL.

Wait! To be continued.

OK. 10 minutes to 1pm.

Here I am, still waiting, but at a different check in counter. I am told that I had to wait till the very end. OK. Taking a seat. Telling the story.

Lets start from where we left off yesterday. After writing the blog post at the First Class lounge, I watched a little of One Tree Hill. Waiting for buka puasa.

Then at 5.45, a fraction of time before buka puasa, an announcement was made. The flight, as it happens, is not happening on the day itself. And then a woman came to bring us all back to the plane, to pick up hand luggage left on the plane. So off we to the gate again. Waiting. There were lots of theories exchanged on what happened to the plane. Some “Thank God it didn't take off yet.” Some crying. Frenzied “Where are we supposed to go now?” And lots of staff trying to explain the situation. We were informed the flight will be off at 9am. We were to take our check-in baggages. Those living far are to get hotel accommodation, those living in Sydney, free transport home, and back to the airport in the morning. 6.30 pm.

So off we went to the baggage – umm... what do you call them? - carousels area. Were told that luggage is coming out at carousel 4. So a huge crowd was there when I arrived. Imagine the whole content of a plane in one place. This was after I had a 'Did Not Depart' stamp on the stamp of my passport (Yup, stamp on a stamp.). So we waited patiently for our luggage. Then, bags started clunking out on the conveyor belt. Announcement: Passengers of Malaysian Airlines flight please proceed to carousel 1 to collect your luggage. Like, oh man. What else can go wrong? I had nooooooo idea. So off we went to carousel 1. Collect bags.

And we got out. A staff waited for us outside. Malaysian Airlines passengers, please move to bay 28. Please call this number to confirm the time of your flight tomorrow. If you're staying in Sydney, we have a car voucher for your trip. Please collect them at bay 28.

Walked. Krispy Kreme! Donut! Hungry. Remember: Belum buka puasa. Had only water. So stopped by. The guy behind the counter saw me and was like, “Hi. Welcome to Sydney.” Uh-huh. Yea. Rub it in that I never left! So OK. Paid. “Enjoy your stay in Sydney. Hope to see you again.” Yeeeaaaaa. Alright. Move on.

Another staff was there. “Follow these two gentlemen to bay 28.” Followed. At Bay 28, BUS!!! We get a hotel room! Yay. Don't have to travel alllll the way back to Macquarie.

In the bus. Announcement: This bus is taking you to Hotel Mercure where you get a room for the night. Your flight will depart at 12 noon tomorrow (Insert groans here. Another delay!). The bus will pick you up tomorrow at 8.45 form hotel Mercure to the airport.

So off we went to Hotel Mercure. To be continued...

So folks. I'm back. In the First Class Lounge. I'm back right where I started. I'm about so close to give up, I would right now except I'm already checked in and through immigration. I'm still fasting. And today is so exhausting. With waking up early and all, queuing for hours. With parched throats, and sore feet. Didn't bring my jacket, so I was shivering. I'm about 2 seconds to falling asleep. In short, I'm cold, tired and hungry. And the last thing I want to do is write this blog post. All you have to know is that this flight is delayed by more than 28 hours and I've about had enough of this damn nonsense.

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!! Fuck.

Sorry, that was vulgar. But you would understand too if you're in my position. I shouldn't have checked in. Should have called my boyfriend to pick me up and take me home. Come back here 5 hours later. That is, if the flight is still not delayed another 5 hours. Whatever. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

You wouldn't be jealous of me anymore if you are stuck in this lounge for the next 5 or 6 hours either.

So I'll continue the story later. That is if I come out alive. Suicide definitely is an option right now. Besides, how cool is it to die in Malaysia Airlines first class lounge. Definitely cool.

Till then.

LoVe~

MzP<3

Flight Delay

20 September 2008

Guess where I am right now? While I'm writing this, I'm sitting at a nice comfortable chair on the Malaysia Airlines First Class lounge. First time I'm ever here. No, I am not doing this to make you jealous or something. The other way, actually. I think you'd be glad you're not where I am right now. Long story.

Right now it's just a few minutes past 4pm. Buka puasa is in an hour and 45 minutes. My flight was supposed to be at 2.20pm. That was almost 2 hours ago. OK. Story begins.

Today was a tiring day. A loooong day. Woke up later than I should. Too tired. I shouldn't have slept at all last night, but well, I just couldn't resist the bed. So with wet hair after getting out of the shower, I slept.

Let's talk about yesterday first.

It was Macquarie University's Conception Day yesterday. I went at around 1pm. Stayed in the blazing sun for hours. Me and Fatin. And we were fasting! So it was a day with a lot of 'dugaan'. We buka puasa in the Conception Day area. Enjoying Butterfingers and Grinspoon performing. Mostly we were sitting aournd talking, watching other people get drunk. Trust me, they start drinking at 9am! They were chugging plenty of glasses of beer. I have never (Or should I say nevah) saw that many drunk people before in my life. That was a first.

And they were handing out free cans of Coke Zero to everyone. In the hot hot hot sun, and we were parched, with dry throats. That was a hard fasting day. Surrounded by people carrying around drinks. And eating. One guy was eating a kebab next to me. That was... painful. So me and Fatin endured the whole fiasco thing.

After breaking fast or buka puasa, we started partying. We watched Butterfingers for awhile. Then we went inside to join the clubbing crowd. We started to try to enjoy ourselves. A really good looking guy tried to dance with me. Then, I felt Fatin pulling me away. A fight broke out right there on the dance floor, and when I moved away, I just saw a guy collapsed on the floor, unconcious. Adrenaline rush. We got scared. Stayed far away. Then when we walked past the scene to get out of the building, I saw paramedics putting oxygen mask on the guy and pools of blood on the floor, from the impact of his head hitting the floor. Rumours heard. Fatin knew him. It was said that the guy was...

An announcement. They didn't have any information yet. I'm going to be stuck here all day. *Sigh. OK, back to the story.

Right. It was said the unconcious guy on the floor was actually trying to stop the fight going on. But he got punched by someone. Hard. While he was unaware. So he collapsed. It was rumoured the guy who punched him got away.

So the image of an unconcious guy on the floor lying in a pool of blood totally shook us. We got out, sorted ourselves, then got into the crowd enjoying Grinspoon. The mosh. We were repeatedly splashed with beer and God only knows what. The drunk people were jumping into us. And Fatin seemed to not enjoy herself too much in the crowd. So we got out after 2 songs.

Got on the big huge slide. Not a really good idea since we were both weraing skirts, but we figued, what the hell. The drunk people were fooling themselves worse than we ever could anyway. That was cool. We got out of Conception Day 10 minutes past 8pm, after Grinspoon's encore, which was cool. There were buses for people who wanted to continue partying at The Ranch. We decided to retire (Well, it was more of Fatin's decision since I thought the night was too young. But partying alone would not be fun either) and head home. Made coffee. Started packing for the flight.

Followed Fatin home to see her newly decorated wall. Stayed there until 1.30am. Got home. Continued packing. Fatin IM'd. “Zue, I just got out of the shower. You should shower too. Remember we were splashed with beer and all.” So I got into the shower, shampooing my hair. Got out of the shower. Bed looked too inviting. Couldn't resist. With wet hair, I collapsed, sleeping until morning. Zzzzzzzz....

OK, so that was yesterday. This is today's story.

So. Morning came. Set my alarm for 7am. Couldn't get up. Went back to sleep. Woke up again at 8. Still can't get my butt out of bed. Then at 9 something I got up. RUSHED!!! I was planning to go to Macquarie Centre to do some last minute shopping. Didn't get to go.

So my baby and I went straight to the city. Pitt St Mall. Peter Alexander. Bought something for the people back home. Wanted to buy something for my mum. The pants I wanted doesn't have size available. The salesgirl said they have the pants on George St, Near Matrin's Pl. So we walked there. Almost 12 noon (My flight's at 2.20 remember?). Got there. They didn't have the size I wanted. I was fuming. The other girl said they had two. She suggested David Jones. Are you kidding??? No time. Bought the next nicest thing they have available in the size I need. Walked back to the car. 12.15pm. Shit. We're late.

Next destination: Bligh. Not airport yet. Why? To get my camera. Left it there 3 weeks ago. Mum will kill me if I went home without my camera. So my baby drove me to Bligh. 12.30pm. Yani and Ririn was there.

“What time's your flight?” “2.20. I have to be at the airport now.” “You're crazy.”

“OK, selamat hari raya!” “Selamat hari raya, guys.”

Drove to the airport. Someone called. Nasty words exchanged. Got off the phone devastated. Don't want to go home. Don't want to get on the flight. Got to the airport. 1pm.

Checked in. Cried. That was emotional. Said goodbye to my baby. It was either going to be my worst raya ever, or definitely the best in a long time. Don't want to go home. Hugged my baby. It might just be the last time. Felt so down. So so so down.

Walked in. Cried all the way to the gate. Cried at the waiting area. Boarding. Went in. Good seat. Read the newspaper, magazine, cry some more, and ordered my buka puasa food from the stewardess. Thought crossing my mind: Is it me or there's something wrong with this plane? Something doesn't seem right. Oh well, it's probably just me and my bad state of mine. Don't wanna go home! I hope the plane crashes. I hope something goes wrong. I hope I don't have to go home. I hope the plane doesn't crash. Don't wanna die. Wait, not that bad. Just hope something goes wrong and parents get worried. Bla bla bla bla bla....

My Way came on the stereo. Cried some more. This is so movie like dramaticness. Plane moves. Pilot announcement: Something wrong with plane. We're going back to the gate. Plane moves. Thought it's OK. Cried myself to sleep. Plane stop moving. Steward: You have to get of the plane. Me: Why? Steward: There are fumes from the Business Class area. Engineers have to check.

Waited in the hot hot hot plane for thenm to open the gate. Smelled the fumes. Bad. Got out of the plane. 3.30pm. Walked to the lounge. Toilet. Phone call to parents. Phone call to my baby. 3.50pm. Back to lounge. Open laptop. 4pm. Logged in to the internet. Internet doesn't work. Write blog post on Open Office writer. Announcement.

Now: 5pm. Buka puasa: 45 minutes. Still no news of flight.

So that's the story of how I got here today, right now, in this big comfortable seat in the First Class lounge, writing my blog. Waiting for buka puasa. What the hell am I going to eat later? No idea.

I'll post this on my blog much later. Once I get internet connection. Till then, wish me luck!

LoVe~

MzP<3

Mortality in Jeopardy

Right now, only one thought is repeatedly going through my mind: I wanna die!!! OK, glad to get that off my chest.

Reason: I have to send in a biiig assignment tomorrow. It's 40%!!! Forty-effing-percent and I have noooo effing idea what to write that is actually worth 40%!

And to make it worse, I have a mid-term exam tomorrow. Economics. And I have no idea even what to study. Between trying to write something that's worth 40% and studying for an exam worth 20%, on the same effing day, you know why my train of thought is what it is right now.

Once again, I feel like just dropping it all. You know, fuck it. Just fuck it. But 40% and 20%??? I can't even fuck it if I want to.

Sorry for being so negative in this post. But I am too negative right now.

Amidst all the bad things, though, there is one good thing. I have a big chance of making it as a Social Director for MSA. Yay! Social Director!! OK, I know I won't be excited about it so much once the workload comes rolling in, but right now I still consider it great. I mean, I have an excuse to go to the city every week again! I can organise dance parties!! I might still be a little too shy, but I'd be kick ass in this, you'll see.

BUT. Now, I still have to think about the 40% and 20% for tomorrow. And after it's over (at 5pm) I'll have even bigger problems to think about. Which is pushed to the back of my mind right now. Just to give you a sneak preview, I have another assignment to send in on the 3rd of October. During the holidays. But guess what? I'll be in MALAYSIA at the time. How the hell do I send a book when I'm in a different country altogether? Any ideas? But since I have no effing time to think about it now, I guess I've got to just suck it up at the moment.

Not to mention the fact that I have to start packing on Conception Day! C'mon, I just want to party but even that is apparently too much to ask for.

Hey, and does anybody else suddenly stop and think, "Where did the time go?" I feel like I'm in a time warp where I'm accidentally transfered to the future, missing alot of past events. Sort of like Adam Sandler in Click. What the hell happened this semester???

Then there's the fact that I'm still not in good terms with my mother. And I'm going to meet her in two effing days!

I'm dead. I wish I could mean that in the literal sense though. Literally, I'm alive. Just maybe having my soul sucked out. Soulless. So in a sense, I'm still dead.

When life is so topsy turvy, I can't help but wish things like that. How do you know what is more important: Your education, your happiness or your relationships? It's like the opportunity cost I learn in Economics. You can't have everything so you choose to do the things with the least opportunity cost. Because of limited resources. But when you don't deal with money, how do you know the value of the things you're giving up? How do you know what you give up is the least opportunity cost? HOW???

I apologise! I realise this post is the post with the most swearing I've ever written. And also I'd like to apologise for the typos which I know is soooo much in this post. Sorry, I'm basically rushing through this post so I can get back to my work. Why I even bother to write this post though? Because I need a break! And it's at least keeping me sane telling someone about it.


LoVe~
MzP<3

Piece of Mind

The mint chocolate chip ice cream shampoo is getting old. Sure, it makes my hair smell good. And it's a really good shampoo. Made my hair all shiny and bouncy and healthy and stuff. But can you imagine having to smell mint chocolate chip ice cream everytime you shampoo your hair? It makes me want to just pour the content of the bottle in my mouth. I love mint chocolate chip ice cream. And right now I'm craving for some. And to make it so much worse? It's fasting month! And the smell even lingers on my hands after I get out of the shower. How do anyone deal with that? Fasting and all. It sure is killing me. Slowly.

Right now it's 2.48am. I'm still up. I feel my life is purposeless these days. My memory is still failing me. I can't even keep up with social events anymore. My laundry is piling up. Well, at least I'm not broke anymore. That's a relief.

I'm lost without my planner. I still can't find it! Me and missing things. *Sigh*

I have been sick for the past, I don't know, 3 weeks? And it is so tiring. I hate being sick. Being bed-ridden. Not being able to do anything. Not being in the mood to even cook for myself. And today, just when I thought it is all ending, I get food poisoning. Of the really bad kind. I was vomiting and stuff. And the pain of my stomachache was unbearable.

I know in some ways, I probably deserve this bad turn of things, but I don't know if I even deserve it to this extent.

And last night? Didn't even get to talk to Julie before her flight. I told her to SMS or call me once she is at the boarding gate. She didn't! And then when I called she didn't pick up. It was devastating. And today I had to see her farewell party pictures, of all things. Well, I didn't see them before because I thought I couldn't take it, since I wasn't there and all. But I found out it is worse than I thought! Someone was there. Not just anyone. Him. Which turned everything around. Which made me see red. Made me furious. What right does he have?

On a better note, I'm happy. My baby surprised me the other day. He turned up out of the blue. I didn't expect it at all. And when he said, "Look out the window," I thought he was joking. When I saw his car, I still didn't believe it because it just seemed too good to be true. And then he said, "That's me." OMG. OMG, I was running down the stairs as fast as I could, bursting through the back door and jumping into his arms. How I missed him. It was the best surprise ever. I still smile with the memory of it. He's the best. I didn't expect it because he lives, like, 2 hours drive away. And he drove all the way. To top it off, we had a fight that day. But when he showed up, I was too happy to even be mad at him anymore. It's like, I can't be mad!

I wish I get that kind of surprise every day. I wish I had that kind of overwhelming happiness all the time. It is the best feeling ever. It's beautiful. I wish I get to see him everyday. But his voice on the phone is not a bad substitute either.

OMG. Now I'm angry. What the hell was he thinking??? Whatever.


LoVe~
MzP<3

Julie Baby!

OMG. OMG OMG OMG. OMG!!!!!

Please don't let this be the day. Don't let it be the most dreaded day ever.

I'm going to cry soooooooon.

Please don't let it be the day Julie leaves. Please. Please. Please.

I cannot imagine. I cannot imagine Julie not being there. I cannot imagine going back home to Malaysia and she won't be there. I can't imagine not being able to call her anytime I want to ask her out. I can't imagine not being able to see her for a long time. I can't imagine not having sleepovers with her.

Julie is the only person ever to really understand me. I can't imagine not having that anymore. What if I need her? What if I need to talk to her? What if my whole world is falling apart and she's the only one who can make it right again? What will I do then?

I really can't stop myself from crying. Julie, my best friend, is leaving. Maybe for good. How do you deal with that? How do you let go a part of your life that you love so much? How do you let go a part of your life, period?

As I'm writing this, Julie is on the way to the airport. You have no idea how devastated I am for not being able to send her off. She'll be there at the airport, surrounded by her closest friends... except me. I won't be there. It would be an empty space. I hope she knows, I'm still there in essence. My heart is there. It will always be there. With her.

I won't get to hug her before she go. I won't get to smile at her and seeing her smile back. I'm going to miss her like hell. Like never ever ever before.

Tell me, how do you separate two best friends that are so very close? I hope you can't. I hope it's not possible. Because even if we change, we will still be us. And if we understand each other, we always will, even if we change, cos we'd still be us.

Julie,

I love you! Sayang you! I'll miss you soooo damn much. I wish you never had to leave. But despite that, I wish you the best. The best ever. That, no matter what, everything will turn out fine. And know that at the worse of times, I will always be there. Just give me a call. Even at 4am, I will still be there. Always always always.

I hope Uni life treats you well. You'll have good times and bad times. But in the end, it'll all be good. I hope you make loads of great friends who would never let you down. And if they do, I'm there. I hope you get your dreams fulfilled. I hope your dreams and wishes come true. Most of all, I wish you'll be happy. Always. Because I can't imagine not being there for you if you're sad.

Be strong, girl. The world is in your hands. You'll achieve success and you'll always find the right way. And remember, if something goes wrong somewhere, God will always make it right some other way. So be strong ok, dear. And even if the world seems like it's falling apart, just remember what I said. everything will always turn out alright.

And Julie, thank you for being there for me. Thank you for everything that you've done. Thanks for staying up to teman me. Thanks for sharing your food with me. Thanks for driving all the way just to see me. Thanks for listening to my problems when I call. The list goes on and on and on. So thank you. I really appreciate all of it.

And I'm also sorry, baby. Sorry for whatever I've done wrong. If I've ever hurt your feelings with anything I've said or done. I've never meant to. Sorry for the fights we had. Sorry I called you a slut (Hehe). Sorry for being 'me' sometimes.

I will cherish every memory I've had with you. The staying ups, the Kenny Rogers, the walking to Pavilion, the Tony Romas, the sambal ikan bilis, the tears, the stories, the sleepovers, the boys, the sakit peruts, the parties, the fights, the phone calls, the SPM, the dressing ups, the art works, the radio dedications, and everything that I couldn't remember at this time. I enjoyed every second of it.

525,600 minutes. That's how much we have in a year. And that's every minute I count to get to see you next. Times 3.

Don't you dare ever forget me. Ever. I mean, EVER.


I sayaaaang you, Julyana. Forever and ever. Best friends forever!!! (2005-now)


LoVe~
MzP<3

Broke

I'm broke. Like, so broke like I've never been broke before, broke. Like, big zeroes broke. Like, empty wallet and bank account broke. Ouch. It hurts.

To make it worse, I lost my house keys. Got to pay $20 to make a new one. And I can't even afford that. So now I don't have keys to enter my own house. And is also the only thing stopping me from doing my laundry right now. And trust me, my laundry is heaps. Heaps. Funny, I do have the gold coins to do pay for them. I just don't have the key to enter the laundry room. I just never have any luck with laundry.

I need food. But I'm just so lazy to cook!

I want to make a nice lemon meringue pie right now. But I know no one's going to finish it. Any takers?

Come over my house for buka puasa and I'll prepare a really nice meal. But it has to be when I am not broke anymore. Then I can make a really good meal.

I'm still in two minds about going to Yaya's farewell. Although I so really really want to go, I don't know how it will play out. Going on Friday morning would be too early for me. Having to catch a bus at 9am. Then, getting a bus to Sydney Uni. It might be better if I go to the city on Thursday night, sleepover one night and go with whoever's going to the graduation. That seems like a better plan. But. Problem. First, I'm going to have to pack. Then, it's the fact that I have to sleepover someone's house. And then there's my mum. She is in this phase where she is trying to control my movements. So sleeping over at the city would be a humongous no-no.

So I guess my best bet is to give up hours of my sleep on Friday morning. The day I usually get to sleep in a little bit. Oh well, I'd rather give up a little bit of my sleep than incur the wrath of my mum. I wonder why she'd trying to control what I do even when she's in a different country. Oh well. Welcome to my life.


LoVe~
MzP<3>

Something to Stress About

I was walking back home when the tears finally came.

I am not the best daughter, or the most perfect, but I am great and I know that.

Don't I deserve the chance to make mistakes once in awhile?

Don't I deserve to be trusted at all?

I know my mother just thinks the worst of this situation. In reality, it's not that bad. Things just look bad. But in reality, it is not that bad. She's just overreacting.

Don't tell me I have to be the bigger person again.

It was just a few months ago when she asked me if I drink. I was very very offended. How could she even think like that of me? I don't even smoke. I never tasted even a single sip of alcohol in my life. Ever. Is that so hard to believe?

I have been good. Yes, I have a boyfriend now, and it might not be who she wants it to be. It's Ramadhan now for God's sake. I have a respect for Ramadhan too. I do have virtues.

There are things happening around my mum that's worse than me and what I'm doing. There always are. But I've never brought down someone else to bring myself up. That would be dead selfish. And I still wouldn't do that now. I wouldn't do that to her. She deserves to trust everyone else while she still can. Eventhough I'm not one of them anymore.

I have not been spending every single second with my boyfriend. I have not abandoned my studies for him. I have not skipped class to spend time with him. I have not gone to the city every week just to see him. I have not use someone else's name to hide that I'm spending time with him.

Virtually, I have done nothing wrong. Everyone else has boyfriends here. But their parents never made a fuss about that. Their parents know, at our age, that is what's natural. It won't be natural if I don't have a boyfriend.

Again, I can't see what's the big deal. Why can't we have a discussion about this like the adults that we are. Instead of my mum saying that I think I'm old enough to not take her advice anymore. I don't think that way. But I do think I'm old enough to make my own decisions. Her advice is always considered. Always.

I'm still sick now. She didn't even ask.

And then there's the problem with my housemates. I don't even want to get started on that. I wish sometimes they would just mind their own business and stay out of it. But I kind of understand, and trying not to hold it against them. They're just human after all. And what's not human nature to succumb to betrayal one or twice, intentionally or otherwise. What's not human nature to choose sides, right? So I don't really blame them.

Anyway. How do you show someone things are not as bad as they think it is when they are thousands of miles away? Pictures always betray the real thing. Like, I use to think my best friend is having more fun than she actually is. Because she has so many photos of her and her friends, which makes me feel like an outsider sometimes. But really, her life is just the same. I mean, just because she doesn't put pictures of herself doing boring mundane stuff, it doesn't actually mean she's not doing it, right? I hope my mum realises that. If I don't put pictures of me studying and going to class and staying in my room doing nothing, it doesn't actually mean I'm not doing them. It just looks like I'm having too much fun. I'm really just leading a normal life. She's just not here to see it firsthand.

I haven't change. Being in a different country hasn't changed me. I might have different views and know a little bit more than I did before. I might be a little bit more exposed than I was before. But I still haven't changed. I still know what's right and what's wrong.

Changing boyfriends doesn't make me any different. I'll still be me.


LoVe~
MzP<3

I Miss You, You Know

He went home.

I opened my laptop. And it was playing the song Home - Westlife. I press play. And the first thing I heard was, "I miss you, you know."

Wow.

I miss you, you know.


LoVe~
MzP<3