Future

Back to bed.

Watched an old movie today. The CDs my baby gave me. That was good.

Played badminton. BADminton. Cos I'm just so bad at it, it's embarrassing. I mean, no one's bad at badminton. NO ONE!

As uneventful as today was, I'm still happy. Going to see him tomorrow. Yeay!!!

Sometimes I really want to know what the future holds. And sometimes I really don't.

Knowing would be nice. Knowing would prepare me. Then maybe I'd stop wasting my time trying to get things I'll never get and start spending more time on things I will surely get.

But not knowing would be sweet. Surprises, they're sweet. Not knowing what's coming makes you treasure what you have more. Alot more. And when good things come, it'll be the sweetest surprise life could offer. Sweet and simple.

Then there are times when it's just driving me crazy. Times when I know part of the future but not all. When I know my dad will be angry but I don't know why. When I know a friend would betray me but I don't know how. When I know that drink would spill but I don't know how to avoid it.

It makes me think sometimes, the future, is it written in stone? Is it really changeable? Or is it not? If I be nice now, I know it will change my future, but is it written that I would be nice? Or is that something only I decide?

I keep on thinking, but I know I'm not supposed to. I'm not supposed to think too much about the powers that be. I know, I know.

You know what? Someone did predict my future for me once. Last year.

And so far, I think some wasn't right. But I can't be too sure. Thing is, I wanted some to be right, and others, not so much.

So that's why I want to know so much about the future. Not my future, exactly, but what the future really is. I'd like to know.

Because there are times where the present is where I really am and really want to be. But there are times when I just can't bring myself to just be at the present. There are times when it is all about the past and the future. When right now is the illusion and the rest is the reality.

Gosh, I'm rambling.

But actually right now all I want to do is stare into his eyes. And stare at them forever.



LoVe~
MzP<3