Believe it or not, I'm in college right now, at 8.15 in the morning, in a classroom. Apparently I forgot I have no class this morning so I woke up a whole hour earlier for nothing. Sad isn't it? Could've gotten more sleep. I seriously think one of these days I'll end up in a hospital for exhaustion. I remember to be so tired on Wednesday that I almost drop during my piano lesson. Well, it's the teacher's fault anyway. Our lessons are supposed to be every Thursday but we never have it on a planned day. Moreover, if she wants to come for a lesson for the week, she'll give me the latest notice possible, sometimes 15 minutes before the lesson. It's so frustrating. After her lesson on Wednesday, I slept until dinner because I was so tired, and I practically shouted at my aunt who tried to wake me up. I think that there's not really a big chance for me to get admitted into a ward anytime soon anyway. This is not as worse as my condition in KYS. There, I had so little sleep that sometimes in the morning, I could sleep standing up. Seriously. Not on purpose, but when I stopped walking, I'd straight away fall asleep. And I'd jerk awake when I find myself almost falling.
Actually I'm alone in class. Everyone else is doing who knows what, and since I'm the only one who forgot(it seems), I'm sitting in class alone. The others probably have plans already this morning. I really shouldn't be sitting alone though. Well, I'm going somewhere now so I'd continue this later.
Later: It's 1.30 in the morning now. Just came back from Opu's farewell party, she's going to the UK. My brother just came back from a prom, and guess what? He got Prom King. Kind of surprising to me, but he's okay I guess. Wish I had a that kind of time in my secondary school year, but my school was too close-minded that prom isn't even allowed. And even if it is, we probably only allowed to wear something really... unsexy and boring and nice. Well, even if there is a prom, I doubt I'd get Prom Queen. Boys would definitely not vote me(because they think I'm bad) and teachers would make sure I won't win. What can I say, I'm just too much for the school to handle. You know how when the more people don't know you, the more likely they are to spread terrible stories about you. I was a victim of that. Let me tell you a story.
There was once a beautiful town, with a beautiful neighbourhood, one that could be described as perfect. The roofs were colourful and everyone was friendly to each other. Something was a little out of place though. There was a big house on the hill that was not as colourful as the other houses and it is surrounded by roses. An old man lived there and took care of all the roses. This old man didn't really mix around with the villagers and they thought him scary and creepy and mysterious-even more because he was so obsessed about his roses. Everyone in the village talks about him and say things like he's a vampire or he's a monster or a murderor or he captures villagers to keep as captives. All these stories go around and nobody knows which is the truth. People become really scared of him and will not approach his house. Kids threw stones at his house. Some people tried to destroy his roses. They will leave him out of celebrations and festivities of the town.
One day, during aspring day, the old man was out in his garden tending to his roses when he found a birthday card to a guy named Joe. He picked it up and as he walked back to the house to throw it, the rain starts pouring and he got striked by lightning. He died straight away in his garden. His body wasn't found until the next day by some villagers who were walking past. Story went around the village about his death and they tried to find a relative who knew him. When they found no one, and saw the card the old man was holding, they said his name is Joe and his birthday was the day before. He was buried with this name and birth date.
This story tells you something doesn't it? Each and every one of the villagers spread stories about him thinking they know everything about him, or try to show that they know something. In the end, they didn't knpw a single thing about this guy, not even his real name or his birthday. Who knows, if they actually get to know him better, he might be a nice guy who knows more then the others think they do. Well, I'd say that's the nature of most humans. Like I said, the more you don't know about someone, the more likely it is that stoies are made up to fill that empty space in our minds, and when that empty space is there, it will except anything, even a piece of a puzzle that doesn't fit.
LoVe~
MzP<3
22 September 2006
21 September 2006
Walking by the Days.
I met someone the other day. I don't mean someone as in a guy that I'm interested in, but a girl. A friend's friend. Let's not put names here because I wouldn't want to offend anyone even if they take none from my blog. She's 19, a year older than me. And married. Well, I didn't think much of the married part, because it's very legal to be married at 19 anyway. But what really caught me was that she got married at 14. This is illegal here, but well, not in Thailand. So, at a very young age she got married, and had a child at 15. I wouldn't exactly bat an eyelash if it was 100 years ago or even if I'm in Indonesia, where it was normal to get married at 10. Now, it just doesn't seem likely to meet anyone married at that age(the legal age's 16). Now she has 2 kids and I just heard her say that she is still breastfeeding. I wonder what it's like to be at my age now, and coming back home to have little kids of my own who breastfeeds. Plus, if I got pregnant at 14, baby would be older than my baby brother. Don't get me wrong, I admire the fact that she didn't abort, but I wouldn't give myself eternally to a man at that age. I'd go crazy. I mean, even she is getting divorce papers now(a rumour that seems very true). And how did she go to school at 15 with a pregnant belly?! Wouldn't that attract alot of attention? I wonder... But I'm glad I didn't have to go through that. My father would disown me. Seriously.
Schoolhas begun. It does suck, but at least I'm not staying at home doing nothing. It's a nice change to be with friends. School events keep me occupied too, so it's not that bad between classes.
Today and yesterday there was a blood drive at the college, you know, when the people from blood bank comes to get blood from volunteers who'd want to donate. Once again, I got rejected. This is my second attempt at donating blood. Why don't they want my blood?? It's not that bad. The reason this time is that my last asthma attack was too recent(the last reason was my migraines are too serious). The doctor said I might get an asthma attack after the donation because some people have 'shortness of breath' after the process. C'mon, those people who needs the blood to survive wouldn't exactly care if the donor had 'shortness of breath' saving his/her life. I mean, my blood could save someone's life! And it's not like I need all of my blood anyway. My blood cells are going to die in 120 days even if it stays in my body, and why wouldn't I give them away before they die and I have to make new blood? Okay, forgive me about this babble about blood. For those of you who don't already know, I'm a Biology student. Explains, huh?
I just found out recently that people are reading my blog. I thought nobody was. I don't mind, but if I have an audience, I better watch out for what I write. It might just be read by the wrong people. And you know people these days, they get all emotional and angry at something bad they read that they think are related to them. Which means that I have to learn to stop babbling before I hit a nerve. Well, it's not llike I care too much, but I've heard people got arrested by polices because of what they wrote in their blog(this girl was writing about poisoning her mother). On the other hand, I guess a blog could also make someone very famous. That's interesting. I used to hink that people who reads blogs have nothing better to do(well, it's still partially true). The reason I wrote a blog is to practice my english writing. Being famous at the same time does me good too.. :-P
Talking about being famous, I signed up in a contest to be L'oreal's face for their Studio product. I was persuaded(more like forced!) by Sailormoon :p. Haha, she's my classmate. Well, since my modelling is seriously down the drain, I thought, why not? She did ask for 50% of my cash prize though. My stupid agency has not contacted me for so long. Not even for new profile pictures. Maybe I'm just not needed in the market now. Whatever. They just went quiet after their planned reality TV show didn't work out. I wonder why(the show didn't work out). They even got sponsors already.
I was opening the iPod website today to redownload my iTunes, and I saw the very new iPod Nano and Shuffle. They're so cool that I feel like I want to put a picture of them in my blog. I guess since my iPod Mini is terribly irrepairable, it could be the new item on my wishlist(refer to the list on my previous post). BUT, there's a problem uploding the beauties.Well, I'll try to fit them in next time. This talk about beauty reminds me of this guy who described his discman as 'sexy'. Just reminded, nothing else, nothing more.
By the way, I had another fight with my stupid BF/exBF. He didn't call me this whole day. That's seriously a record. Well, if he's not interested anymore, I'm not waiting around for someone who does not appreciate my presence. Let's make the 7months to 7years. I'm cool. I might even get a chance with that copilot(tall, dark and handsome) that I had a crush on. Who knows, I might.
Almost forget: The fasting month, Ramadhan is starting next week. Great, a chance to lose weight!
LoVe~
MzP<3
Schoolhas begun. It does suck, but at least I'm not staying at home doing nothing. It's a nice change to be with friends. School events keep me occupied too, so it's not that bad between classes.
Today and yesterday there was a blood drive at the college, you know, when the people from blood bank comes to get blood from volunteers who'd want to donate. Once again, I got rejected. This is my second attempt at donating blood. Why don't they want my blood?? It's not that bad. The reason this time is that my last asthma attack was too recent(the last reason was my migraines are too serious). The doctor said I might get an asthma attack after the donation because some people have 'shortness of breath' after the process. C'mon, those people who needs the blood to survive wouldn't exactly care if the donor had 'shortness of breath' saving his/her life. I mean, my blood could save someone's life! And it's not like I need all of my blood anyway. My blood cells are going to die in 120 days even if it stays in my body, and why wouldn't I give them away before they die and I have to make new blood? Okay, forgive me about this babble about blood. For those of you who don't already know, I'm a Biology student. Explains, huh?
I just found out recently that people are reading my blog. I thought nobody was. I don't mind, but if I have an audience, I better watch out for what I write. It might just be read by the wrong people. And you know people these days, they get all emotional and angry at something bad they read that they think are related to them. Which means that I have to learn to stop babbling before I hit a nerve. Well, it's not llike I care too much, but I've heard people got arrested by polices because of what they wrote in their blog(this girl was writing about poisoning her mother). On the other hand, I guess a blog could also make someone very famous. That's interesting. I used to hink that people who reads blogs have nothing better to do(well, it's still partially true). The reason I wrote a blog is to practice my english writing. Being famous at the same time does me good too.. :-P
Talking about being famous, I signed up in a contest to be L'oreal's face for their Studio product. I was persuaded(more like forced!) by Sailormoon :p. Haha, she's my classmate. Well, since my modelling is seriously down the drain, I thought, why not? She did ask for 50% of my cash prize though. My stupid agency has not contacted me for so long. Not even for new profile pictures. Maybe I'm just not needed in the market now. Whatever. They just went quiet after their planned reality TV show didn't work out. I wonder why(the show didn't work out). They even got sponsors already.
I was opening the iPod website today to redownload my iTunes, and I saw the very new iPod Nano and Shuffle. They're so cool that I feel like I want to put a picture of them in my blog. I guess since my iPod Mini is terribly irrepairable, it could be the new item on my wishlist(refer to the list on my previous post). BUT, there's a problem uploding the beauties.Well, I'll try to fit them in next time. This talk about beauty reminds me of this guy who described his discman as 'sexy'. Just reminded, nothing else, nothing more.
By the way, I had another fight with my stupid BF/exBF. He didn't call me this whole day. That's seriously a record. Well, if he's not interested anymore, I'm not waiting around for someone who does not appreciate my presence. Let's make the 7months to 7years. I'm cool. I might even get a chance with that copilot(tall, dark and handsome) that I had a crush on. Who knows, I might.
Almost forget: The fasting month, Ramadhan is starting next week. Great, a chance to lose weight!
LoVe~
MzP<3
16 September 2006
Of Honour and Glory
I watched Troy again on HBO today. This time watching it, I actually really understand it. And it's actually quite sad. I cried a tear or two, and since I've practically never cried for a movie, this is saying something. I'm quite amazed how when I was younger, and I heard the story of Troy being brought down by complacency and the Trojan horse, I thought the Trojans were the bad guys. In the movie though, the Greek are the selfish, foolish ones, the bad guys. Although movies are famous for turning around people's believes like this, I'm not sure really what to believe. But I have to accept what's been shown in the movie too. Seriously, Achilles isn't a really bad guy. He just have a thirst for glory and fame where his name won't be forgotten for thousands of years to come, which he is brought up with. And like most really powerful and famous men, he is tamed by a girl. Just a girl and this second time I watched the movie, I realized, he didn't enter Troy to fight, exactly. He did that to find that girl, Briseis. The one who gave him "peace at a time of war." The fact that he knew he will die when he enters Troy again touched my heart too, although when he knew this, his intentions of entering Troy was very different. He still died and got his glory, but something that he already learned as not that important as building realtionships with other men. Well, maybe the movie exaggerates this part, but well, it's a good exaggeration.
This Achilles is super great too, killing Prince Hector, a man rumoured to be as powerful as the whole of the Greek army. It touched my heart when he teared up right before he gave away Prince Hector's body to the King Priam. Then he entered the walls of Troy in the Trojan horse, telling he's army of Myrmidon to go home, saying it's his last order for them. He really knew he was going to die. But he still went, to save Briseis. Not for war. I just feel very touched by this movie. Achilles really was a hero. And Brad Pitt did good too. ;)
In the end, I think it is one of the best movie I have ever seen.
This Achilles is super great too, killing Prince Hector, a man rumoured to be as powerful as the whole of the Greek army. It touched my heart when he teared up right before he gave away Prince Hector's body to the King Priam. Then he entered the walls of Troy in the Trojan horse, telling he's army of Myrmidon to go home, saying it's his last order for them. He really knew he was going to die. But he still went, to save Briseis. Not for war. I just feel very touched by this movie. Achilles really was a hero. And Brad Pitt did good too. ;)
In the end, I think it is one of the best movie I have ever seen.
13 September 2006
Sounds and Memories
I was just listening to the Star Wars song of the John William orchestra, the full version. It was superbly excellent. The blend of flutes, violin, tuba, trumpets and all the others just amazes me, gave me goosebumps just listening to it. Then, I realize that I do miss KYS. The orchestra days there, the best days of my life. If I hadn't been in an orchestra, I wouldn't know how to appreciate such music like John William's. Where I learnt to differentiate the difference of all the instruments and the harmony of all blending into one great music. Yes, the days on the orchestra tour all over Malaysia is always etched in my memory. They were great, and so amazing. I played clarinet 1 and it was the higher part of the scores so I'm always nervous before a performance that me clarinet might do those squeaking noises. Especially when they put the microphone right next to me.
I also know why all these while I don't really miss KYS that much. My last days in the orchestra wasn't exactly peaches and cream. There was a girl. I was so close to her, really good friends. But what I don't know is who she really is inside. She had something with a crush of mine once and I should've known then, I guess. I, being me, was cool about it with her at that time eventhough I was burning inside. Thought our 'friendship' was more important than an immature guy. So I let it slip, although we were not very close anymore after that.
My mistake was I told her who my next crush was. Then, out of all subtleties, she tried to get that guy too. But when she can't, she told everyone that I'm 'copying' a senior who had a crush on the same guy once, just to tarnish my name. So me and this guy got closer and closer, me still being oblivious to what she was doing. It all happened in an orchestra tour.
It was my last orchestra tour. We were all assigned busses: Bus1-boys, Bus2-girls, Bus 3-girls&boys. I was in bus2 but I was soon terribly broken to find out that all the other girls my year has someone to sit with - I asked too late. So, to lick my wounds, I sat at the locker area sulking. Suddenly this guy walked by and said, "Explain," so I did. He offered to sit with me if I can transfer to bus3. I tried and tried, but can't. By a stroke of luck though, on the day we get on the bus, they miscalculated and bus2 was overflowing, so I ran off to bus3 and sit with him. That was when we started, me and him, but I'll spare you the details.
Coincidentally, the girl I was talking about was in the same bus as well. Well, something happened in the bus a teacher found out(between me and him) and the teacher made us change seats(nothing bad, really). She saw that, so what she did was straight away sms my BF/exBF. She was good though, instead of telling him(which would make her look bad), she ASKED him. Like, you know, "What happened in the bus? Why'd they have to change seats?" Actually, what she was indirectly doing is letting my BF/exBF know something happened between me and that guy. Then, she went to everyone, acting like she knows what exactly happen and dig out information from those who already know(3 teachers). Then, she told everyone to give me a bad name(boarding schools are close minded enough to think sitting with a guy is bad enough). When I ask her if she knew, she said,"Everyone knows." When, actually it's not true. And she made it as if the teachers were the one who told everyone. I was furious and went to confront the teacher. He questioned a few people and found out it's not true. Unfortunately, the few people he questioned thinks I'm accusing them of something they didn't do. By the end of everything, these few unintetionally hurt people went around telling people how bad I am of accusing them. Naturally, this girl acted like she was a 'victim' of my accusations too, for symphaty.
When we got back to school, half of the school was filled in about 'what happened' and how terribly bad I am, by her. Just to get them all on her side, knowing she ws the one in the wrong. I, on the other hand, was ready to let it go and leave it all behind so I didn't say a word to anybody about what really happened. They take it that I'm the guilty one because of that. Only very few actually came to me and asked, knowing this girl from their own past experience, and want me to reconfirm her words, if they are true. I was hate by more than half the school then. I know, though, that she only did all of that to show to people that I'm better than her. Guess she can't stand seeing my happy, having all that she didn't have. She was only after my crushes to prove to herself that she's 'prettier' and more 'desirable' than me. She told my BF/exBF so that I would lose the one guy who loves me so much(though we were not together at the time, and I wasn't cheating on him), and prove that her boyfriend loves her more and buys her more expensive things. On the whole, I have NO idea why she did all that.
To finish it all off, I had a terribly huge fight with my BF/exBF because, it turns out, he was the one who started contacting this girl for 'information' on me(to spy), knowing she's close to me. He contacted 2 girls, but she's the only one who fed him the 'information' about me. If you want to know, in one of my previous posts, I wrote that we didn't talk to each other for 7 months(and nobody could even say his name around me). This is why. Because he went behind my back to 'spy' on me through a girl who wants to see me down. SEVEN whole months, and I thought I would never ever be associated with him again.
This is the first time I write or talk about this incident, fully. I'm still not in talking terms with this girl. I know Shakespereare said 'To err is human; to forgive, divine' but even he won't forgive someone who does this to him. Maybe all I want is a simple apology. Please don't judge the whole of me only on what I write for this entry today. Somehow, I've been keeping it all for too long and I just want to make my side of the story clear. I know some of you might still not agree with me(especially loyal followers of this girl), but I don't care. Life goes on. And I'd say, 'As hard as it gets, I know it's still amazing to be alive'-La Bella Vita.
LoVe~
MzP<3
I also know why all these while I don't really miss KYS that much. My last days in the orchestra wasn't exactly peaches and cream. There was a girl. I was so close to her, really good friends. But what I don't know is who she really is inside. She had something with a crush of mine once and I should've known then, I guess. I, being me, was cool about it with her at that time eventhough I was burning inside. Thought our 'friendship' was more important than an immature guy. So I let it slip, although we were not very close anymore after that.
My mistake was I told her who my next crush was. Then, out of all subtleties, she tried to get that guy too. But when she can't, she told everyone that I'm 'copying' a senior who had a crush on the same guy once, just to tarnish my name. So me and this guy got closer and closer, me still being oblivious to what she was doing. It all happened in an orchestra tour.
It was my last orchestra tour. We were all assigned busses: Bus1-boys, Bus2-girls, Bus 3-girls&boys. I was in bus2 but I was soon terribly broken to find out that all the other girls my year has someone to sit with - I asked too late. So, to lick my wounds, I sat at the locker area sulking. Suddenly this guy walked by and said, "Explain," so I did. He offered to sit with me if I can transfer to bus3. I tried and tried, but can't. By a stroke of luck though, on the day we get on the bus, they miscalculated and bus2 was overflowing, so I ran off to bus3 and sit with him. That was when we started, me and him, but I'll spare you the details.
Coincidentally, the girl I was talking about was in the same bus as well. Well, something happened in the bus a teacher found out(between me and him) and the teacher made us change seats(nothing bad, really). She saw that, so what she did was straight away sms my BF/exBF. She was good though, instead of telling him(which would make her look bad), she ASKED him. Like, you know, "What happened in the bus? Why'd they have to change seats?" Actually, what she was indirectly doing is letting my BF/exBF know something happened between me and that guy. Then, she went to everyone, acting like she knows what exactly happen and dig out information from those who already know(3 teachers). Then, she told everyone to give me a bad name(boarding schools are close minded enough to think sitting with a guy is bad enough). When I ask her if she knew, she said,"Everyone knows." When, actually it's not true. And she made it as if the teachers were the one who told everyone. I was furious and went to confront the teacher. He questioned a few people and found out it's not true. Unfortunately, the few people he questioned thinks I'm accusing them of something they didn't do. By the end of everything, these few unintetionally hurt people went around telling people how bad I am of accusing them. Naturally, this girl acted like she was a 'victim' of my accusations too, for symphaty.
When we got back to school, half of the school was filled in about 'what happened' and how terribly bad I am, by her. Just to get them all on her side, knowing she ws the one in the wrong. I, on the other hand, was ready to let it go and leave it all behind so I didn't say a word to anybody about what really happened. They take it that I'm the guilty one because of that. Only very few actually came to me and asked, knowing this girl from their own past experience, and want me to reconfirm her words, if they are true. I was hate by more than half the school then. I know, though, that she only did all of that to show to people that I'm better than her. Guess she can't stand seeing my happy, having all that she didn't have. She was only after my crushes to prove to herself that she's 'prettier' and more 'desirable' than me. She told my BF/exBF so that I would lose the one guy who loves me so much(though we were not together at the time, and I wasn't cheating on him), and prove that her boyfriend loves her more and buys her more expensive things. On the whole, I have NO idea why she did all that.
To finish it all off, I had a terribly huge fight with my BF/exBF because, it turns out, he was the one who started contacting this girl for 'information' on me(to spy), knowing she's close to me. He contacted 2 girls, but she's the only one who fed him the 'information' about me. If you want to know, in one of my previous posts, I wrote that we didn't talk to each other for 7 months(and nobody could even say his name around me). This is why. Because he went behind my back to 'spy' on me through a girl who wants to see me down. SEVEN whole months, and I thought I would never ever be associated with him again.
This is the first time I write or talk about this incident, fully. I'm still not in talking terms with this girl. I know Shakespereare said 'To err is human; to forgive, divine' but even he won't forgive someone who does this to him. Maybe all I want is a simple apology. Please don't judge the whole of me only on what I write for this entry today. Somehow, I've been keeping it all for too long and I just want to make my side of the story clear. I know some of you might still not agree with me(especially loyal followers of this girl), but I don't care. Life goes on. And I'd say, 'As hard as it gets, I know it's still amazing to be alive'-La Bella Vita.
LoVe~
MzP<3
12 September 2006
Bored and Untelevisionable
In addition to the computer being annoyingly spoilt, the TV is spoilt now too. Did I mention my phone being all messed up? The point is, I think technology's holding a grudge against me. They're just trying to make my holidays terrible and boring. Seriously all I did was ignore technology for a few years-I didn't bother to know anything about them. Now I'm deprived of the only entertainment at home besides books.
I had a french manicure recently at Midvalley. Now my nails are short. they cut my nails so that all of them are the same lenghth with my broken one. The manicure's nice, though-very natural. Somehow I got the polish on my index finger chipped already... and it's just the 3rd day! It's going to have to be until next month till I get a new manicure and I guess my nails have to suffer another month looking bad. Next time I'm getting a pedicure as well.
At Midvally, my BF/xBF(yea we sort of made up) and I went to watch the Gold Class cinema(for the first time). We watched My Super Ex-Girlfriend(not very worth it). Seriously, It's totally first class treatment. We could order hot drinks and have the attendant come everytime we call them(with a button). The seats are super plush and reclinable-very damn comfortable. There's even a waiting area where we can wait for the movie to start. All these for more than triple the normal price of the average cinema seat. The hall is cold though, but you can always rent blankets. Sometimes it's nice to have a nice relaxing day at the movies instead of rushing and getting only popcorn and cold drinks in paper cups. It's nice to have a big space with so little people and the front person won't block your view no matter how tall he is or how big his head is. You should try it out sometime, but not all the time unless you're super duper rich and want to feel like being treated like royalty.
Me and my BF/xBF had a fight again last night. These fights are really tiring. I think that's why he didn't pick up my calls earlier and didn't bother to come today. Whatever. He'll be the one running back to me later. Plus, I'm seriously really angry at him, because of last night and today. Don't know why but I always wish we don't get back together, but we always do. It's frustrating.
By the way, I discovered a really cool game at Yahoo Games today. It's called Fish Tycoon. Had me absorbed for hours. Had been on the computer since morning today. I'm so stuck on it. Try it. You might just have as much fun as I had.
LoVe~
MzP<3
I had a french manicure recently at Midvalley. Now my nails are short. they cut my nails so that all of them are the same lenghth with my broken one. The manicure's nice, though-very natural. Somehow I got the polish on my index finger chipped already... and it's just the 3rd day! It's going to have to be until next month till I get a new manicure and I guess my nails have to suffer another month looking bad. Next time I'm getting a pedicure as well.
At Midvally, my BF/xBF(yea we sort of made up) and I went to watch the Gold Class cinema(for the first time). We watched My Super Ex-Girlfriend(not very worth it). Seriously, It's totally first class treatment. We could order hot drinks and have the attendant come everytime we call them(with a button). The seats are super plush and reclinable-very damn comfortable. There's even a waiting area where we can wait for the movie to start. All these for more than triple the normal price of the average cinema seat. The hall is cold though, but you can always rent blankets. Sometimes it's nice to have a nice relaxing day at the movies instead of rushing and getting only popcorn and cold drinks in paper cups. It's nice to have a big space with so little people and the front person won't block your view no matter how tall he is or how big his head is. You should try it out sometime, but not all the time unless you're super duper rich and want to feel like being treated like royalty.
Me and my BF/xBF had a fight again last night. These fights are really tiring. I think that's why he didn't pick up my calls earlier and didn't bother to come today. Whatever. He'll be the one running back to me later. Plus, I'm seriously really angry at him, because of last night and today. Don't know why but I always wish we don't get back together, but we always do. It's frustrating.
By the way, I discovered a really cool game at Yahoo Games today. It's called Fish Tycoon. Had me absorbed for hours. Had been on the computer since morning today. I'm so stuck on it. Try it. You might just have as much fun as I had.
LoVe~
MzP<3
11 September 2006
A Night to NEVER Forget
My computer is still going bonkers on me. Everytime I want to use it, it lags so bad and most of my excitement and ideas for the blog will be gone by the time I get to the site. Oh well, lets not let that dampen my spirit(and blog) today. I'm still in a state of bliss from yesterday.
So what the hell happened yesterday? Well, it's Anugerah Era. The Award for local singers. I wouldn't normally go to these things because I'm not really into local music, but we got VIP tickets!!! Now, who would turn that down? Ever??!! The theme this time is denim and leather, so I got my father's leather vest(it's a bit too big but I sorta lurve it) and a denim mini plus a pink tube. Also my pink Tommy heels(killed my feet but who cares?! looks matter!)
Well, it wasn't really the whole awards thing that got me jumping and terribly excited, but more like the After-Party. The award is not so bad this time either. Before last night I always thought someone has been messing the results and awards because the award winners never seem to deserve it(especially 2 years ago). This time, I gues I've been proven wrong. Since Mawi hogged the whole spotlight, it's safe to say the result is very much decided by the audience.
So we went to the super hip after-party. I got pictures with all the celebrities I could find at the after-party. I got pictures with Deanna Yusof(she is effing beautiful-so much more in real life), Felix, Lotter, Faizal(AF4 winner), Dina(Malaysian Idol runner-up), Sazzy and Yasmin Hani(the TV presenters), the lead singer of Spider, AC Mizal(the actor), Adam(my super crush in AF), Hans Isaac(the extremely handsome actor and ex of former Miss Malaysia) and many more!
I wanted a picture with Adam for sooooo long. Been longing to see him in real life and it's worth it! He's so cute....! Faizal is cute too but maybe a little shy. Hans Isaac was a total bonus. I didn't even expect him to turn up at the after-party, him being super populer and all. Every girl I know had a crush on him at least once. Well, he is gorgeous. I am totally stunned by the beauty of Deanna Yusof. I look like a pig next to her. Sadly there are some I missed. Some didn't show up at the after-party. Still, I don't regret it too much as all that I did not miss are worth it. We still waited till late for the legendary Mawi(remember the name). He won seven awards. Unheard of for a brand new-not even fully started-singer. Surely he'll be in Malaysian Guinness Book of Records. That's the only thing we really missed. Hey, who wouldn't want to have a picture taken with this guy? Yea, most people think he's a bit overrated but in reality, we all have been waiting for an Idol like him. A real hero, someone with a squeaky clean image and good looking as well. Guess that's why he's appearance to public is so celebrated.
The whole night was great. Imagine getting to touch the arms of these celebrities. Really knee-buckling, body-melting, heart-racing, goosebump-raising experience. I was floating on cloud nine the whole night. My day was made when I went out of the party and walked down the stairs. Then I saw Hans Isaac again who actually looked at me twice(you know, when you look at someone and then look away, then look at him/her again). I totally had an out-of-body experience. Okay, maybe he was just thinking I look like someone he knows or just realized I was looking at him. But just let me believe that for that split second he thinks I'm pretty. Pretty enough for a second look. Let me believe that. It would really make my day, for days and days to come.
LoVe~
MzP<3
So what the hell happened yesterday? Well, it's Anugerah Era. The Award for local singers. I wouldn't normally go to these things because I'm not really into local music, but we got VIP tickets!!! Now, who would turn that down? Ever??!! The theme this time is denim and leather, so I got my father's leather vest(it's a bit too big but I sorta lurve it) and a denim mini plus a pink tube. Also my pink Tommy heels(killed my feet but who cares?! looks matter!)
Well, it wasn't really the whole awards thing that got me jumping and terribly excited, but more like the After-Party. The award is not so bad this time either. Before last night I always thought someone has been messing the results and awards because the award winners never seem to deserve it(especially 2 years ago). This time, I gues I've been proven wrong. Since Mawi hogged the whole spotlight, it's safe to say the result is very much decided by the audience.
So we went to the super hip after-party. I got pictures with all the celebrities I could find at the after-party. I got pictures with Deanna Yusof(she is effing beautiful-so much more in real life), Felix, Lotter, Faizal(AF4 winner), Dina(Malaysian Idol runner-up), Sazzy and Yasmin Hani(the TV presenters), the lead singer of Spider, AC Mizal(the actor), Adam(my super crush in AF), Hans Isaac(the extremely handsome actor and ex of former Miss Malaysia) and many more!
I wanted a picture with Adam for sooooo long. Been longing to see him in real life and it's worth it! He's so cute....! Faizal is cute too but maybe a little shy. Hans Isaac was a total bonus. I didn't even expect him to turn up at the after-party, him being super populer and all. Every girl I know had a crush on him at least once. Well, he is gorgeous. I am totally stunned by the beauty of Deanna Yusof. I look like a pig next to her. Sadly there are some I missed. Some didn't show up at the after-party. Still, I don't regret it too much as all that I did not miss are worth it. We still waited till late for the legendary Mawi(remember the name). He won seven awards. Unheard of for a brand new-not even fully started-singer. Surely he'll be in Malaysian Guinness Book of Records. That's the only thing we really missed. Hey, who wouldn't want to have a picture taken with this guy? Yea, most people think he's a bit overrated but in reality, we all have been waiting for an Idol like him. A real hero, someone with a squeaky clean image and good looking as well. Guess that's why he's appearance to public is so celebrated.
The whole night was great. Imagine getting to touch the arms of these celebrities. Really knee-buckling, body-melting, heart-racing, goosebump-raising experience. I was floating on cloud nine the whole night. My day was made when I went out of the party and walked down the stairs. Then I saw Hans Isaac again who actually looked at me twice(you know, when you look at someone and then look away, then look at him/her again). I totally had an out-of-body experience. Okay, maybe he was just thinking I look like someone he knows or just realized I was looking at him. But just let me believe that for that split second he thinks I'm pretty. Pretty enough for a second look. Let me believe that. It would really make my day, for days and days to come.
LoVe~
MzP<3
06 September 2006
Holiday Begins
My parents came home today from somewhere(I'm not sure but I can guess) shouting and screaming at my brother. You know, the annoying, self-centered, authority-hating, over-popular brother. Well, he's the brother my mom likes so much. So, yeah, I was pretty surprised my mom shouted at him today, mostly because of his(not good, I might add) studies. I was shouted at too, for not being a 'mentor' and to sit by my brother and 'monitor' his studies every single time. Like I said, he hates authority. He barely listens to his own mother let alone his unpopular, good-for-nothing sister. People like him only belongs at the top, and he needs to get to the top fast. Howerver, I'm not sure someone can do that if he can't tolerate with people at the top ordering him around in the first place. Plus, just because he is so over-popular and liked in his school now doesn't necessarily mean he will be somewhere else. Turst me, he had to start from scratch at another place once and he can't handle it. He can't handle a place where he doesn't hold a post or have some control over the student body. He can't handle being hated by everybody, and he can't survive without his loyal friends around. A good thing is he's always a charmer, charming people wherever he goes. But what happens if ever he's charming ability fails? Then he has to rely on pure ability which he has plenty, but not about intelectual stuff(he's pretty ignorant about those stuff).
Then there I was again, having to help him through this big life-changing exam called SPM. Trust me, I know it's life-changing because I've been there, done that. A lot of people say SPM is not exactly the perfect way to measure a student, but the same people will still judge you according to your result just on the grounds that there's nothing else to judge you with. The point is, no matter how popuplar you are with the teachers, how high the post you hold, and how active you are in co-curricular activities, you wouldn't be better than the guys who're all that and still manage to get straight As.
No idea why my mom blames me for my brother's lack of awareness of the importance of SPM. After all, I tried asking him to drop Biology and take up Accounts instead. He's even complaining to my mom that I don't know the answers to all of his questions. Duh. I don't take Physics or History anymore so how could I possibly remember all that I don't have to remember anymore? Seriously, I have to know how to calculate gravitational forces and wavelengths just because he's taking the exam? I don't think so. Worse, all of it is in another language altogether and since I had converted all my studies to english, I wouldn't exactly remember what some terms mean. Be reasonable, I would try my best to help but really, the rest is my brother's job.
Actually, my holidays have just started(today's the first day) and I deserve a little break. Last night, I slept at 4a.m. which was nice because I don't remember the last time I slept after 12 midnight. Actually, I wanted to catch Deperate Housewives since I missed yesterday's episode but it turns out, it's one of the really ancient episodes(where Susan just discovered Zach is Mike's son). Woke up at 11 something this morning. I should do it more often but this time I better have a good movie to watch.
My AS finals is in 4 weeks. I'm scared s***less. Guess that explains why I lost all sense of humour in my writings. You guys reading this must be bored stiff. Well, my life's not really that bad, just that when I have a good time, I'll usually be caught up in it that I woudn't want to be confined to the computer to write about it. But I promise that if I have time this holiday, I would definitely wqrite more often. So often that you won't be able to catch up with all of it. Till then...
LoVe~
MzP<3
Then there I was again, having to help him through this big life-changing exam called SPM. Trust me, I know it's life-changing because I've been there, done that. A lot of people say SPM is not exactly the perfect way to measure a student, but the same people will still judge you according to your result just on the grounds that there's nothing else to judge you with. The point is, no matter how popuplar you are with the teachers, how high the post you hold, and how active you are in co-curricular activities, you wouldn't be better than the guys who're all that and still manage to get straight As.
No idea why my mom blames me for my brother's lack of awareness of the importance of SPM. After all, I tried asking him to drop Biology and take up Accounts instead. He's even complaining to my mom that I don't know the answers to all of his questions. Duh. I don't take Physics or History anymore so how could I possibly remember all that I don't have to remember anymore? Seriously, I have to know how to calculate gravitational forces and wavelengths just because he's taking the exam? I don't think so. Worse, all of it is in another language altogether and since I had converted all my studies to english, I wouldn't exactly remember what some terms mean. Be reasonable, I would try my best to help but really, the rest is my brother's job.
Actually, my holidays have just started(today's the first day) and I deserve a little break. Last night, I slept at 4a.m. which was nice because I don't remember the last time I slept after 12 midnight. Actually, I wanted to catch Deperate Housewives since I missed yesterday's episode but it turns out, it's one of the really ancient episodes(where Susan just discovered Zach is Mike's son). Woke up at 11 something this morning. I should do it more often but this time I better have a good movie to watch.
My AS finals is in 4 weeks. I'm scared s***less. Guess that explains why I lost all sense of humour in my writings. You guys reading this must be bored stiff. Well, my life's not really that bad, just that when I have a good time, I'll usually be caught up in it that I woudn't want to be confined to the computer to write about it. But I promise that if I have time this holiday, I would definitely wqrite more often. So often that you won't be able to catch up with all of it. Till then...
LoVe~
MzP<3
05 September 2006
The Bridge
It's a title of this book I'm reading, maybe a bit draggy, but still interesting. It' about a man talking about his life on a bridge which is the life he remembers(he has amnesia) and he never got off that bridge(hospital regulations and stuff). This bridge has everything on it, hospitals, bars, trains and all those things. Claimed to be connecting the City and the Kingdom. Don't ask me, I don't know what it is either because it's hard to understand. I suppose he's been on an accident and now he's on a coma and he's living in another world where everything is weird (Like about a dozen different languages are spoken on the bridgeand there are no cars, only bicycles and they are taxed by the number of wheels so most travel with unicycles). Can't wait to finish it. So people, if you're looking for a book to read,I would say it's a good one(so far) but the english is abit advanced.
Today was my last paper, Thinking Skills. I decided that I like Thinking Skill paper 1 because it's really IQ testing. I love to do all these IQ questions. So from now on I'll be looking forward to Thinking skills paper 1 (more than other papers, at least).
Went to One Utama today... with The Chlorophyll (Fei), V and Peter. It was nice.. and the only exercise I had all week. Pathetic, I know. Well, we watched Click(again). It's not like I don't like click, I just don't like it enaough to watch it in the movies twice. I just hate the part that he skipped his whole life just like that. Seriously, it's the little things in life that's special, not those big things. Fast-forwarding my life is something I would seriously not do. Time moves too fast already as it is. Still, I do think Adam Sandler was great in the movie. I mean, he never really did any sentimental stuff before and it's nice to see him at it.
By the way, on the way back from One Utama, I got lst with V. Getting myself lost on the roads is really normal tyo me but today I think I set the record for being lost the farthest. I went all the way to Bukit Jalil sports school. That is pretty far, really. Thank God for U-turns. Wish they'd make more of it though, then I wouldn't have to go that far. All in all, I spent more today than I really should have. For petrol and toll. If I hadn't got lost, I wouldn't have had to spend that unnecessary eextra money. Such a waste.
Love~
MzP<3
Today was my last paper, Thinking Skills. I decided that I like Thinking Skill paper 1 because it's really IQ testing. I love to do all these IQ questions. So from now on I'll be looking forward to Thinking skills paper 1 (more than other papers, at least).
Went to One Utama today... with The Chlorophyll (Fei), V and Peter. It was nice.. and the only exercise I had all week. Pathetic, I know. Well, we watched Click(again). It's not like I don't like click, I just don't like it enaough to watch it in the movies twice. I just hate the part that he skipped his whole life just like that. Seriously, it's the little things in life that's special, not those big things. Fast-forwarding my life is something I would seriously not do. Time moves too fast already as it is. Still, I do think Adam Sandler was great in the movie. I mean, he never really did any sentimental stuff before and it's nice to see him at it.
By the way, on the way back from One Utama, I got lst with V. Getting myself lost on the roads is really normal tyo me but today I think I set the record for being lost the farthest. I went all the way to Bukit Jalil sports school. That is pretty far, really. Thank God for U-turns. Wish they'd make more of it though, then I wouldn't have to go that far. All in all, I spent more today than I really should have. For petrol and toll. If I hadn't got lost, I wouldn't have had to spend that unnecessary eextra money. Such a waste.
Love~
MzP<3
Tears
Like so many of my normal days, I just had a fight with my boyfriend/ex-boyfriend. Sometimes I wonder why I go through all this, it's just too energy sapping. And so incredibly time-wasting, not to mention stupid. You know that song by Stevie Wonders "I Just Called to say I Love You"? Well, try the opposite. He just called to say I'm selfish. Which, naturally, made me slam down the phone. That's just him telling me he's still angry and he won't be coming to apologize tonight but he misses me and all the times we spent together... and all that bulls***.
The phone rings again. I really wish he'd stop because it's getting really annoying. I can't recall a night we didn't fight during my exam. Maybe it's my fault too as the stress really gets to my head, but what was he doing snooping around my phone for? Well, actually we were fighting because of a lot of reasons. Started off small and innocent enough when it gets bigger and bigger. Then all of a sudden he starts shouting at me because of his 'discovery' that I was smsing my other ex last Sunday. So happens that that Sunday we had a huge fight and he was home sick(read: he was sleeping the whole day until 9p.m. not bothering to call). Well, coincidentally, my other ex (the younger immature one) decided to sms because he was 'wondering what I was doing'. I suspect my BF/xBF found out a few days ago and he thinks I was going behind his back. Like, hellooooooo? Why would I hide something like this? And as it turns out, I thought so little of the sms incident that I totally forgot about it. Which is also why I didn't tell him. I simply forgot. And if you want to know, to make it all fair, I ended up having a 'disagreement' with this immature guy. Why? because he wasn't so happy that I had 3 boyfriends since him and he had none. Guys' ego, you know.
Well, ego and jealousy just can't seem to escape guys. Ego I can stand. Jealousy? Aren't you happy enough that I'm yours in the first place? God, MEN! It all ended up with me forcing him out of my house and him calling me selfish and say all of the terrible things he can say about me. That is him people. He is not trying to make me angry so much as trying to make himself angry. Make himself angry enough to walk out of my house because if not he'll remember the times (7 months) he spent without me and he'll turn back. This time he got to make himself angry enough to get in the car and drive away. He might reach his house, and if he did I won't be seeing him until tomorrow, at least. Good. Finally I have some time alone.
Today is unofficially the last day of my trials. Overall, I did averagely bad. And failing Chemistry is definitely not impossible. If my results are as bad as my last exam, I'll probably end up 6-feet under. Actually I still have my Thinking Skills paper tomorrow but I have no idea what to study for Paper 1. It's like doing SPM all over again and doing the accounts MCQ paper last. It's just frustrating. But also good to know the worst's over.
So today I have a hope that my life will end up like last time(the 7 months) when my BF/xBF is nonexistant in my life. I remember being happy then. Boyfriendless, but happy nevertheless. Oh yea, did I mention? Me and my BF/xBF were not on good terms(the 7 months) because of this immature guy from my old school. So if we go through a long period not talking to each other again, it'll funnily still be because of this guy, indirectly. I just thought of that.
Well, look at the bright side, I can now go get that guy driving a Mini Cooper!
Love~
Me<3
The phone rings again. I really wish he'd stop because it's getting really annoying. I can't recall a night we didn't fight during my exam. Maybe it's my fault too as the stress really gets to my head, but what was he doing snooping around my phone for? Well, actually we were fighting because of a lot of reasons. Started off small and innocent enough when it gets bigger and bigger. Then all of a sudden he starts shouting at me because of his 'discovery' that I was smsing my other ex last Sunday. So happens that that Sunday we had a huge fight and he was home sick(read: he was sleeping the whole day until 9p.m. not bothering to call). Well, coincidentally, my other ex (the younger immature one) decided to sms because he was 'wondering what I was doing'. I suspect my BF/xBF found out a few days ago and he thinks I was going behind his back. Like, hellooooooo? Why would I hide something like this? And as it turns out, I thought so little of the sms incident that I totally forgot about it. Which is also why I didn't tell him. I simply forgot. And if you want to know, to make it all fair, I ended up having a 'disagreement' with this immature guy. Why? because he wasn't so happy that I had 3 boyfriends since him and he had none. Guys' ego, you know.
Well, ego and jealousy just can't seem to escape guys. Ego I can stand. Jealousy? Aren't you happy enough that I'm yours in the first place? God, MEN! It all ended up with me forcing him out of my house and him calling me selfish and say all of the terrible things he can say about me. That is him people. He is not trying to make me angry so much as trying to make himself angry. Make himself angry enough to walk out of my house because if not he'll remember the times (7 months) he spent without me and he'll turn back. This time he got to make himself angry enough to get in the car and drive away. He might reach his house, and if he did I won't be seeing him until tomorrow, at least. Good. Finally I have some time alone.
Today is unofficially the last day of my trials. Overall, I did averagely bad. And failing Chemistry is definitely not impossible. If my results are as bad as my last exam, I'll probably end up 6-feet under. Actually I still have my Thinking Skills paper tomorrow but I have no idea what to study for Paper 1. It's like doing SPM all over again and doing the accounts MCQ paper last. It's just frustrating. But also good to know the worst's over.
So today I have a hope that my life will end up like last time(the 7 months) when my BF/xBF is nonexistant in my life. I remember being happy then. Boyfriendless, but happy nevertheless. Oh yea, did I mention? Me and my BF/xBF were not on good terms(the 7 months) because of this immature guy from my old school. So if we go through a long period not talking to each other again, it'll funnily still be because of this guy, indirectly. I just thought of that.
Well, look at the bright side, I can now go get that guy driving a Mini Cooper!
Love~
Me<3
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